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Open Poetry #7
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500 miles
| Open Poetry #7 |
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500 miles |
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Elliott Junior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 35Chapel Hill, NC |
street scene serenades slip past my windowshade and push the dust inward disturbing a dark room's silence you couldn't be here too soon, too soon to save me from gray walls closing in; i begin to think and Reason calls my name. i scoff at it, throw a book into the flame and watch it melt to orange, then red, then black, then gone. Hello, Faith. one salty drop from your eye could fill a dried ocean, launch a thousand ships, cause me to fall into the slipstream, muscles twitching in a waking dream. one word from your lips could bring me to my knees- at one with the ground, not making a sound, so elementally true and engendered by you. [This message has been edited by Elliott (edited 04-30-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Elliott - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
you couldn't be here too soon, too soon to save me from gray walls closing in; i begin to think and Reason calls my name. ---------------- one word from your lips: could bring me to my knees, there on the ground, not making a sound, there on the ground, juxtaposed to you, you who are so true. --------------------- cool, Elliotts back... with a very cool poem... this is very well written, love the expression of emotion in this... love a man on his knees(poetically speaking) *smile* >>"you couldn't be here too soon, too soon to save me"<< love that line... excellent poem, thanx for the read. take care, jm Is it too much to find an answer, Is it too much to hold you close. Is it too much to find a reason, Is it too much to free my soul -- From self control ... And I know you're always waiting for me ... You take me far away, And I know you're holding me ... And it's better now ... ~vertical horizon~ |
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Elliott Junior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 35Chapel Hill, NC |
yep, i'm back, and lately the juices have been flowing  thanks for the compliments, JM. you're a sweetie. |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Thanks Elliott, I enjoyed this. Such love -- and such one salty tear. Wow --- netswan |
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Dawn Eclipse Senior Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 637The Horsehead Nebula |
That was a beautiful. The first line was my favorite. I enjoyed it very much. "It is in our aloneness that we recognize our oneness, even as the single droplet of water knows also that it is the sea."Daniel *Cassie Roseen* |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
very expressive! Kathleen |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Very well written, Elliott. |
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Elliott Junior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 35Chapel Hill, NC |
BTTT, b/c i changed it a bit and made it less cheesy.  [This message has been edited by Elliott (edited 04-29-2000).] |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Elliott, Excellent work. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Elliott~ This is quite an elegant piece. You have pulled me into your head ... very well done. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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