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Passions in Poetry

The Sound...(For my daughter)

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Sparticus
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since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


0 posted 11-23-2003 12:47 PM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

A sound moves up the carpeted stairs
past the light blue painted doors
to the bathroom. The light stings
like strong bleach and you hear the closing
of its eyes to steady its tired body as
the rhythm of sleep beats in steady breathing.

The mirror is veiled by worn age looking
staring, dreamily remembering the day a baby
daughter stretched into this world like a worm crawling
through her mother's body.

The bullet path moves by in a blur until she is grown.
The sound has done this walk up the stairs and peered into
her room, guarding her from night invaders taking away her
dreams, every night strode in, listening to the breathing
until the blur grew brighter.

All the nights it labored and days it slept her away.
It would give back all its sleep, to have her young again.
The mirror is veiled but doesn't lie, the face worn to
ashes and pulsing veins where the fire once burned where
the sound is just a ghost of I.

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa

© Copyright 2003 Sparticus - All Rights Reserved
jaicie114
Senior Member
since 09-27-2003
Posts 758
On the edge of forever


1 posted 11-23-2003 01:05 PM       View Profile for jaicie114   Email jaicie114   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jaicie114

What an incredibly powerful poem of love, Sparticus...thank you so much for sharing a piece of your heart.

Love and Light...jc

This I know as Truth...we are all Beings of Light.

Sparticus
Member
since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


2 posted 11-23-2003 01:10 PM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you, J.C. And welcome to the PIP!

Sparticus
Trillium
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Member Patricius
since 03-09-2001
Posts 12129
Idaho, USA


3 posted 11-23-2003 01:17 PM       View Profile for Trillium   Email Trillium   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Trillium

Sparticus:  This is a very moving and complex write!  I never thought of sound as a "presence" before, but I will from now on.
Thank you for sharing this with us! Will look for more from you!

Trillium

Betty Lou Hebert

Sparticus
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since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


4 posted 11-23-2003 01:22 PM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

I work nights, getting home in the dark, climbing those stairs.  That is how this was inspired.  Thank you for the response, I have  many more to share...all in the appropriate time.


Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa

SharaRose
Member Elite
since 07-19-2003
Posts 2535
Somewhere out there~


5 posted 11-23-2003 08:06 PM       View Profile for SharaRose   Email SharaRose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SharaRose

Oh those night walks just to watch over the little ones. Watchful of these precious little ones, keeping care of their well-being. Momma's, and daddies keeping a vigil at times when they are sick, too. This was bourne of sweet loving caring feelings. Very nice.
Love,
Terri~
junemac
Senior Member
since 04-24-2003
Posts 1019
uk


6 posted 11-24-2003 03:02 AM       View Profile for junemac   Email junemac   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit junemac's Home Page   View IP for junemac

incredibly sensitive write, i like forward to reading many more like this.

excellent !!!

welcome to the corner from me too :0)

xxjune xx
Sparticus
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since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


7 posted 11-24-2003 10:20 AM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you Terri and Junemac for reading and your responses.  I very much appreciate my work being read.


Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores


8 posted 11-24-2003 06:48 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

OhJesse~
I have known the sound of sound in quiet vigil of the night~

This moved me to a teary remember~
So blessed am I to know you~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram
       noles1@totcon.com   

Sparticus
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since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


9 posted 11-25-2003 02:47 AM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you so much my dear friend. I really am glad that you enjoyed this too.

Marge you are so good to me.

Jesse
passing shadows
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since 08-26-99
Posts 46297
displaced


10 posted 11-26-2003 04:14 AM       View Profile for passing shadows   Email passing shadows   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for passing shadows

I work nights too...I enjoyed this piece and will click it into my library for future reading
Sparticus
Member
since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


11 posted 11-26-2003 08:18 AM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you, Shadow, for reading.  Working those nights...I have done it so long that I don't even remember Prime Time!

Sparticus
BloomingRose
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since 08-09-2000
Posts 3124
Florida


12 posted 11-26-2003 03:14 PM       View Profile for BloomingRose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for BloomingRose

Very good.
Been there, and time goes so fast. Too fast.

Deb
Sparticus
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since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


13 posted 11-26-2003 03:20 PM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you kindly for your response to this poem, it was a very fast time for me too!  Believe it or not, I am ready to begin again!


Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa

cusick
Senior Member
since 07-27-2003
Posts 673


14 posted 11-26-2003 04:08 PM       View Profile for cusick   Email cusick   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for cusick

Spaticus, what i would like to have said has been said. This is beautiful and such an enjoyable rtead. Maggie
Mistletoe Angel
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City of Roses


15 posted 11-26-2003 06:16 PM       View Profile for Mistletoe Angel   Email Mistletoe Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Mistletoe Angel's Home Page   View IP for Mistletoe Angel



(big hugggsssssss) God Bless You, sweet friend, I am only twenty but dream in the future of having a family and getting to look through my children's eyes and see the spirit of the child in me and cry in joy reflecting on it! (smiles) I love this, sweet friend, your daughter is so blessed and lucky to have you and will tear in joy reading this, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jesse, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

Sparticus
Member
since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


16 posted 11-27-2003 02:39 AM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you, Maggie and Noah...you both are such great parts of this PIP place I really am happy to be part of it.


Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa

Insomniac Cat
Member
since 09-23-2003
Posts 70
The Land of the Dadaists


17 posted 12-01-2003 07:15 PM       View Profile for Insomniac Cat   Email Insomniac Cat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Insomniac Cat

Sparticus, I like your poetic style. I enjoyed this greatly!

"I am the hobbyhorse. I am the stapler in the mud, the toad in your brain. I am a head full of birds, a future full of apples."

Sparticus
Member
since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


18 posted 12-02-2003 02:30 AM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you, Cat.


Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa
http://www.geocities.com/amanaman3/Jessepoems.html

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
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since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


19 posted 08-19-2006 01:34 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal


Just perusing the archives of PiP ...
finding that I miss your gentle tellings~

Also popping in at your web site ...
nice to see you my friend~

*Huglets*
(yeah ... I still got lots of these)
~*Marge*~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email -       noles1@totcon.com       

Sparticus
Member
since 11-15-2003
Posts 249


20 posted 08-19-2006 01:39 PM       View Profile for Sparticus   Email Sparticus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sparticus's Home Page   View IP for Sparticus

Thank you my dear friend.  I have been away from poetry for a spell, but once Summer has passed and I am back in a schedule with a new step son in my life, I will be writing again.

Yours,

Sparticus

Even with insects-
some can sing
some can't

-Issa
http://www.geocities.com/amanaman3/Jessepoems.html

Joyce Johnson
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since 03-10-2001
Posts 10059
Washington State


21 posted 08-19-2006 03:24 PM       View Profile for Joyce Johnson   Email Joyce Johnson   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Joyce Johnson

i wonder how I missed this on.  It is an old story of love, well told.  Joyce
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