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SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert

0 posted 2003-02-16 01:25 AM



THE GLASS

The glass
A kaleidoscopic wonder,
Fragmentizing life
Into a many faceted oneness.
It is a barricade
Against unseen forces,
A shelter from the enemy,
From life, from self.
It has a warmth
That fuels the fires
From so deep within,
That the cold is unknown.
It holds joy, laughter,
And a tingling sense
Of goodness.

The glass is a deceptive tool,
It is an excuse
For an inexplicable destructiveness.
Its hold is strong, forceful,
It won't let go.
The mind is thrust
Into a black hole
Of nothingness
Resulting in - nothing.
Love is destroyed
At the very root,
Poverty is created,
Poverty of the heart,
Of the soul
Of the consciousness.

The glass is
Oft times desirous,
Yet so very evil,
Creativity, morals,
Human decencies and values
Are blatantly cast aside.
The need for such things
Is lost, as each swallow
From the glass is greedily taken.
It has made losers out of winners,
Cowards out of heroes,
And sinners out of saints,
It is a war zone,
Where there is no war.

The glass
A kaleidoscopic wonder,
Fragmentizing life
Into a many faceted oneness.

A SELF-MADE HELL


I be me BUT who does me be?

© Copyright 2003 das - All Rights Reserved
cupcake
Member
since 2003-01-05
Posts 116

1 posted 2003-02-16 01:54 PM


Pretty powerful this. Excellent!

I'm a reader - not a writer.

Marge Tindal
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since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
2 posted 2003-02-16 02:24 PM


SPIRIT~
There appear to be many facets of the 'glass' that are tempting~
Intriguing perspectives~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com                        

SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert
3 posted 2003-02-16 03:24 PM


Thank you for reading and commenting.

I be me BUT who does me be?

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
4 posted 2003-02-17 02:43 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Das, this is so very sad but true, sweet friend, there are so many optical illusions we confront in life and I only wish love could be authentic to all in understanding and we can embrace it rather than see it behind a display case! (sad sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Das, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-02-20 05:11 AM


wow....
SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert
6 posted 2003-02-20 09:17 AM


Thank you for commenting.
lorenlynn
Member
since 2003-01-27
Posts 203
California Beaches
7 posted 2003-02-21 02:06 AM


I see this every day!! great writer when do I get to read your novel?
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
8 posted 2003-02-21 12:24 PM


I agree, this is a very powerful piece of work... thanks for sharing

regards,
sudhir

Joyce Johnson
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Member Rara Avis
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912
Washington State
9 posted 2003-02-21 08:51 PM


great story Spirit.  You seem to have an endless supply.  Love, Joyce

[This message has been edited by Joyce Johnson (02-21-2003 08:52 PM).]

CHILI
Member
since 2002-09-08
Posts 244

10 posted 2003-02-22 10:15 PM


Spirit, this is one heck of a write!  Thanks for sharing.  "rainbow"
Chanson
Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle
11 posted 2003-02-23 03:07 PM


I am adding my voice to the others.
Very nice piece, Spirit. *s

When you think you have heard it all,
listen more closely.
~Dorene

fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

12 posted 2003-02-23 04:51 PM


An impressive, multifaceted description of drinking and all its various pitfalls.  Perhaps you might like to try putting some structure into some of your poetry.  You certainly are able to accomplish much with words but you may be able to accomplish still more if you apply the correct structure to them.  Poetry is an excercise in creativity in so many more ways than just the words themselves.  That's what makes it so fun both to write and to read.

"If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"
-- Magus
"there is no good and evil, there are just sides."
-- Local Parasite

SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert
13 posted 2003-02-23 08:18 PM


You are probably correct but to be perfectly honest I don't know what 'structure' means. For over 50 years I have been writing bits and pieces strictly to please myself, if I had to have stopped and 'educated' myself and conform to what things should be I would never have written a word for learning and I never meshed at all, not as a child and not as an adult. I appreciate very much your comments, indeed I do, but I honestly don't believe I am going to change at this stage of the game.
fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

14 posted 2003-02-24 03:32 AM


I guess by structure I meant some form to the poems rather than the somewhat jumbled lines you have here.  I am amazed!  You have been writing for fifty years!  I don't think you're ever too young to learn.  As far as "conforming" to something, I think that education doesn't conform you.  Rather, it throws fuel on your own personal fire of intellectual progress and even rebellion.  Sure a lot of what you come up with in life is not original, but the act of coming up with it or experiencing again what inspired someone to come up with it can be just as rewarding as a truly original idea.  But if you give your mind a steady diet of new ideas[I believe this to be not much different from any formal education save for some lack of formality and perhaps a teacher], which you are doing here, I imagine, you will invent new creations and new spins on old ideas.  

In truth, however, I think my initial comment about your form was unfounded.  It seems I hadn't explored enough of your work.  But I do hope my above pointers on *education* were helpful nonetheless.  Heck, it should be me accepting hints from you, lol!

"If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"
-- Magus
"there is no good and evil, there are just sides."
-- Local Parasite

SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert
15 posted 2003-02-24 09:30 AM


Thanks for commenting again and one is certainly never to old to learn. But I write to enjoy myself. I found studying a most enormous chore, I was always a dreamer  whilst my sister has spent her whole life in study mode. We are who we are, by design or otherwise.  I like to putter around putting pen to paper and writing sometimes about what I know, sometimes not. My brain is intact though - honest!
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
16 posted 2003-02-24 01:28 PM


Very powerful write..much enjoyed.
Gets my vote..and a hug!

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling
17 posted 2003-02-25 11:58 AM


wow,I knew I drank too much...........but to rub it in.............ouch.
Jason

coyote
Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077

18 posted 2003-02-25 07:51 PM


Good write, Spirit.

Sometimes what is in the glass is what creates the Hell. Speaking from "The Corner Pub" that is.

I know mine was.......?

coyote

"The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none."
Thomas Carlyle

[This message has been edited by coyote (02-25-2003 07:52 PM).]

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
19 posted 2003-03-01 08:11 AM


The intricacy of a kaliedoscope... is a wonderful theme.. I enjoyed this...
Nightshade
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Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
20 posted 2003-03-01 09:04 AM


SPIRIT - you know...I have enjoyed everything I have read by you thus far, and this one belongs in the book too!! Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers-
that perches in the soul....
                  
                       -Emily Dickinson

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
21 posted 2003-03-08 04:09 PM


Now I loved this, and your comment about "structure" as I am in the same area, knowing not how I write I just do!  

           
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
Aretha Franklin  

aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448
Universal Mind
22 posted 2003-03-08 10:08 PM


I like it!

~Every girl has a dream within.

Flower
Member
since 2003-03-15
Posts 240
California
23 posted 2003-03-15 12:34 PM


This I can relate to, it is very true.
WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
24 posted 2003-03-16 12:10 PM


The glass
A kaleidoscopic wonder,
Fragmentizing life
Into a many faceted oneness.
It is a barricade
Against unseen forces,
A shelter from the enemy,
From life, from self.
It has a warmth
That fuels the fires
From so deep within,
That the cold is unknown.
It holds joy, laughter,
And a tingling sense
Of goodness.

I liked this especially

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