in your eyes i long to slumber

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Corner Pub #2

in your eyes i long to slumber

Permiabilities
Junior Member

since 2002-07-05

Posts 27

0 posted 2002-07-25 03:15 AM

hello all...im fairly new here. im pretty sure ill be around this fourm...my new hangout if you will. the open poetry fourm is too hectic. so again hello to all and here is a poem i hope everyone likes!

in your eyes i long to slumber

and what do i have to do,
to rest in your eyes again?
in your dreams,
and in your head?
what do i have to do,
to make it all end?
sometimes...
i stay up way to late,
and sometimes...
i think too much
i crack and i break.
sometimes...
it's all too much,
and there is no more i can take.
and what do i have to do?
to make it all end?
to sleep,
to rest...
in your eyes again?

[This message has been edited by Permiabilities (07-25-2002 03:16 AM).]

Joyce Johnson

Member Rara Avis

since 2001-03-10

Posts 9912
Washington State

1 posted 2002-07-25 10:07 AM

Welcome to our corner Perm. The secret to success in any forums is to rad and answer other poems also. That way you will begin to make friends. You have asked an age old question about love. Joyce

Purple Poet On Wheels
Member

since 2002-06-21

Posts 145
Pittsburgh/Edinboro, PA

2 posted 2002-07-25 07:57 PM

very cool you might want to break up the stanzas for more emphaes

Trillium

Member Patricius

since 2001-03-09

Posts 12098
Idaho, USA

3 posted 2002-07-26 01:44 PM

Welcome to the forum and will enjoy reading your poems. I like your poem, but if I may make a suggestion, it would be improved with punctuation. It would make it more dramatic.

Betty Lou Hebert

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