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allan
Senior Member

since 2000-04-09

Posts 620
On the road

0 posted 2001-06-02 07:17 PM

turquoise your eye
fixed in yellow jade
behind a flower mask
always make me sigh

aching swell of the sea
i stir honey in my tea
on a white coast
eating blackened toast

helicopter twirls
eats my words
you stare back
looking blank

from the heights of
duncansby head
i leave my brain
at home
to roam

blinking back the rain
struggle hard against the wind
looking inside i find
a harbour for thought

i wish us there tonight
after the old men have gone
their twinkling talk
drifting in the gorse

by the lap of bright water
on white stones
by the wooden benches
hard against the wall
ease aching backs
playing
at being free

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 2001-06-02 10:40 PM

Allan~
Such nostalgically lovely rendering ...

'looking inside i find
a harbour for thought'

I REALLY like this phrase.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

2 posted 2001-06-03 10:46 AM

Good imagery and lots of specific phrasing, well done!

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

allan
Senior Member

since 2000-04-09

Posts 620
On the road

3 posted 2001-06-03 11:40 AM

Thank you Marge and Irish Rose

allan
Senior Member

since 2000-04-09

Posts 620
On the road

4 posted 2001-06-03 11:52 AM

Thank you Marge and Irish Rose

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

5 posted 2001-07-26 12:32 PM

"playing at being free..."

that part stuck fast..we do sometimes pretend that we are free..even as we feel we are somewhat trapped...but for a moment, it is a good freedom..aye..

this is probably not what this poem is about..lol..but thats the part i got the most from today..

much enjoyed..and will read again..maybe tomorrow, it will say something different to me....lol

hugs, g

"sometimes when youre hurrying too much to see whats for tomorrow, you miss whats for today.." -demi moore

Trillium

Member Patricius

since 2001-03-09

Posts 12098
Idaho, USA

6 posted 2001-07-27 06:31 PM

A rather haunting poem but very enjoyable.

Betty Lou Hebert

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