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Open Poetry #8
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brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland

0 posted 2000-06-28 02:04 PM


My severed tongue, in your absence, bleeds.
It soaks, in the oral depths of a tourniquet,  
upon juices moist and acrid,
my liquid guilt no doubt.
Eyes keep the rhythm of time,
one second and one flick of lash,
one minute and they clamp shut
swelling tears down grey skin face.

It was your charisma that kept my faith,
your balance upon my skin
warmed my smile, your playful
grappling with my organs, squeezing
always satisfied. You always took
pleasure in observing me bleed,
you had me drained so often
as I lay on your lap or on my knees.

I want to burn holes through that shirt;
your little soft torment and parting memento.
I sink deeper to drive away the lingering
sweetness of your skin bathed in satin,
I despise  the passion perfume soaked fabric.
You would mock my torment, my broken emotions.  
When I gather strength I will burn the wretched thing
Only wish it were you that will be erased in the flames.

You always wore your heart on your sleeve,
Open and precious for me to behold,
I held it once when love occurred,  
or so I thought. Its tender breath entranced me.
That candle in your eyes, the silken whispers
It was a charade; your heart is nothing only
a black gem, charcoal deception, stitched in angelic intent.
You were fools gold, a Syrian, that sucked me under.

"monuments put from pen to paper turns me into a gutless wonder" Manic street Preachers



[This message has been edited by brian madden (edited 06-28-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-06-28 02:41 PM


Eyes keep the rhythm of time,
one second and one flick of lash,
one minute and they clamp shut
swelling tears down grey skin face.

It was your charisma that kept my faith,
your balance upon my skin
warmed my smile, your playful
grappling with my organs, squeezing
always satisfied. You always took
pleasure in observing me bleed,
you had me drained so often
as I lay on your lap or on my knees
----------------
I want to burn holes through that shirt;
your little soft torment and parting memento.
I sink deeper to drive away the lingering
sweetness of your skin bathed in satin,
I despite the passion perfume soaked fabric.
You would mock my torment, my broken emotions.  
---------------
You always wore your heart on your sleeve,
Open and precious for me to behold,
I held it once when love occurred,  
or so I thought. Its tender breath entranced me.
That candle in your eyes, the silken whispers
-------------------

damn...WOW...ouch...again WOW..
you blew me away with this one Bri...
(and remind me to never make you mad)  
my goodness darlin...this one BLEEDS
talk about impact of emotion and imagery
talk about lines that kick in the chest ...

"you had me drained so often
as I lay on your lap or on my knees"

then there is the grace ...

"You always wore your heart on your sleeve,
Open and precious for me to behold,
I held it once when love occurred,  
or so I thought. Its tender breath entranced me.
That candle in your eyes, the silken whispers"

amazing ...perfect.

"It was a charade; your heart is nothing only
a black gem, charcoal deception, stitched in angelic intent."

again ... damn...

ok...i'll stop worshiping now...*smile*
later my poetic-prophet-gator
eve



you can say baby
baby can I hold you tonite
maybe if I said the right words
at the right time
you'd be mine
baby can I hold you tonite

Tracy C

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
2 posted 2000-06-28 04:55 PM


What janet said!!!
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2000-06-28 07:47 PM


I could smell the cloth of the shirt burning...awesome...been there, felt that...almost too good.  sigh.
Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
4 posted 2000-06-28 09:17 PM


Brian*  This is so painful...each line like a pathway of broken glass and the longer I read the more cuts I felt.  Very powerful and very moving.  
brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
5 posted 2000-06-30 03:14 PM


Jan, thanks for your reply. Oh you could never make me mad besides I am only putting on a tough act. I wouldn't hurt a fly unless he made me mad.  

Martie, thanks for your reply. Our Jan does have a way with words lol

serenity, I am sorry that you could relate to the poem. It is somewhat of a fictional piece. I have yet to get that intense in a relationship. thanks for your wonderful reply.

Butterflys sorry about the sharp edges in the poem, handle it with care and I will file down the edges when I can.   thanks for your very kind words.



"monuments put from pen to paper turns me into a gutless wonder" Manic street preachers

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