navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #8 » Good-Bye Co-written with Jeffrey Carter
Open Poetry #8
Post A Reply Post New Topic Good-Bye Co-written with Jeffrey Carter Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA

0 posted 2000-06-27 11:28 PM


Thank you to Jeffrey for writing with me once again.  You have great talent.  It was a pleasure, my friend as always.              

This poem is rendered in the voices of two people.


Man:       Saying good-bye is never easy
               But you know I've gotta go
               I never meant to hurt you
               And I want you to know
               Every time I hear our song
               I'll always think of us
               You deserve so much more
               My love is not enough
  
Woman:    No matter how hard I tried
               I couldn't make you see
               Would've given the world to you
               If only it was meant to be
               I want you to know this much
               Wouldn't trade one single day
               Although the pain is great
               I really have to say

Man:       We both came into this
               With visions os growing old
               Still clinging to each other's hearts
               How did it grow so cold?
               We had planned a life together
               Never dreamed that it would end
               Nothing left to hold onto now
               There's no use trying to pretend

Woman:    I'll never forget that warm day
               When you and I first met
               The sun reflected in your eyes
               And now that sun has set
               Even though this is over
               I hope that you know
               A part of me is with you
               Wherever you may go

Both:       How does one get over
               A love that once was true
               How does one say "good-bye"
               To a love the likes of you
               Maybe one day I'll find myself
               Falling in love again
               'Till then I'll have the memory
               Of the life that we had planned

< !signature-->

Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility.
--William Wordsworth




[This message has been edited by Lone Wolf (edited 06-27-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Jennifer L. Garcia - All Rights Reserved
Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
1 posted 2000-06-27 11:35 PM


very nice ... the two of you do well together
... the two perspectives work well here

Rex}>{{{{o>

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

2 posted 2000-06-27 11:39 PM


~You two are sooo awesome. hehe. It's such a well constructed piece of poetry...yet it brings ache to this heart of mine.  Again,...so well done. Please take care. *Peace.
Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
3 posted 2000-06-27 11:45 PM


let's see...hmmmmm..Vince Gill and Shania?
Nice collabaration.
jamie

Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil.
"Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely".



Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
4 posted 2000-06-28 11:22 AM


You two seem to be so good at this...

Way to go, Jeffery and Lone Wolf...

Regards,
Sudhir

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee,
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;

- John Donne

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

5 posted 2000-06-28 01:04 PM


you guys rock  
this is a perfect duet!!
pretty soon you guys are gonna have to do
a greatest hits collection!!
keep em coming ...
love ya both
later-perfect-match-gators  
jm

you can say baby
baby can I hold you tonite
maybe if I said the right words
at the right time
you'd be mine
baby can I hold you tonite

Tracy C

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

6 posted 2000-06-28 01:10 PM


Wolf, a marvel indeed how the flow seemed to weave thru man to woman and such feelings expressed I am indeed impressed with this one.

  
Coco


[This message has been edited by CocoBaci (edited 06-28-2000).]

Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
7 posted 2000-06-28 06:49 PM


This was nice writing by both of you.  Seem to be in sync with each other.  Lots of emotion in the words.  
~~well done~~
dh

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
8 posted 2000-06-28 07:27 PM


You've done it again ... and beautifully! The flow and perspective was just wonderful ... really well done!  Applause to you both!!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
9 posted 2000-06-28 09:38 PM


Rex . . . Thank you from us both.  We thought so too.  Jeffrey has great ideas.

Spit Fire . . . Thanks, we try.  Had fun with this one.  Sorry to hear we brought you pain.  I hope it goes away soon.  

Jamie . . . Why not?  LOL

Sudhir . . . We enjoy it.  Thanks for the encouragement.

JM . . . We think YOU rock!!!     We will do not worry!!  Hmmm...greatest hits??  Jeffrey, we have hits??  LOL  J/K!!!  

Coco . . . We are happy that you are impressed.  

Dh . . . Yes, we have simialer styles and think alike . . .oohhh, scary!!  LOL.  Thank you.

Kit . . . Thank you, Jeffrey - do we bow now or later??  hehe




Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility.
--William Wordsworth

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
10 posted 2000-06-28 10:00 PM


BRAVO!!!!!  I love this idea and the combo of the two of you make it perfect!!!  Encore!!  

btw...my ICQ keeps locking up my computer today...   we will talk SOON!!  

Holly
Member
since 2000-05-12
Posts 127
Arkansas
11 posted 2000-06-28 10:36 PM


THIS PIECE ROCKS! Facing the same situation in my own life...it hits directly to the heart. I'm so glad someone else can express this for me. Man, I feel like you 2 were reading my mind...I like this.
love & all,
-Holly


I know well what I am fleeing from but not what I am in search of.
Michel de Montaigne


Jeffrey Carter
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!
12 posted 2000-06-29 04:08 AM


One question everyone.....If a ton of feathers fell on your head would it hurt?  LOL

Of course it would.....A ton is a ton after all  

Thank you all for all your support and encouragement

Jennifer..umm...Lone Wolf and I really enjoy writing together, we always have a good laugh (who doesn't need to do that everyday huh?)

Without the support of all of you our efforts would be nothing. So, I thank you from the bottom of my heart

All of your kind replies are .....

All my love,
Jeffrey


Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
13 posted 2000-06-29 09:48 PM


Jeffrey,

Should we experiment with that ton of feathers??  LOL . . . you are too funny!!  We will have to do this again soon.

Thank you to all who replied.  We appreciate it!!  

BDC . . . I understand, we'll catch up!!  


Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility.
--William Wordsworth

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #8 » Good-Bye Co-written with Jeffrey Carter

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary