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Open Poetry #8
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JUngle Mouth Jim
| Open Poetry #8 |
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JUngle Mouth Jim |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada 
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It was Mondy morning, I had no warning my helper came in with sun glasses on. Well, I looked at him and said, "hey Jim what the heck is goin on?" And he said to me through smoke stained teeth, "I ain't too good don't feel like I should but I'll last the day okay." So we jumped in the van with the day all planned, Jim smelled just like Johhny Walker, Well, I let him drive then I realized he probably could'nt walk proper. I lost my nerve when he went over a curb, scraped the underneath and rattled my teeth the yellow light turned again. We pulled up hard in a customer's yard Jim stopped just in front of the garage. We took out the tools and fancy rules and proceeded in with the entourage. Well, Jim lost his way and in a drunken haze walked into a closet and then cursed God awful came out with a scarf over his eyes. I got him out of there cause the customer was scared into the basement making new holes Jim bored. I was talking to the lady laying out the basics when Jim drilled right up through the floor. It was new hardwood all shiny and grooved and up through the middle Jim drilled a little hole not to be ignored. Well, she let out a scream and I could'nt seem to calm her down for the life of me. Jim swaggered upstairs wood chips in his hair sporting a grin like a geek. Well, she turned with a spin and threw a book at him without an inch to spare it breezed by his hair and broke the glass in an old art print. Jim, he was so suprised that he fell to one side and the tip of his drill jammed into the burglar alarm and on came a siren that smothered her crying and signaled the local Gendarmes. First there was her siren then came their sirens and as the cars rolled in I got to looking at Jim wondering if he had a cemetery plot Well, she was in grief with tears on her cheeks when the police came in through the door. Then Jim got nervous thinking things were serious and dropped the drill on the floor. Now how could you figure he'd jam up the trigger standing right there in the middle of nowhere over a small long haired dog. Yes sir. the bit on that thing wound up to sing got tangled in all that fur, his skin tightened up I thought his eyes would pop he wailed like a hound or a cur. The drill came to a hum with the dog almost done and Jim tripped himself and broke a ceramic shelf before he unplugged the cord. She was still crying while her dog was biting the cop that was trying to save him. She looked at me and it was plain to see I was out of there but mostly Jim. So with everything in hand we headed for the van that Jim by and large had parked close to the garage but it was nowhere to be seen. Well, I looked at Jim and that smoke stained grin told me we were still in a mess. Jim not thinking claer did'nt leave the van in gear it rolled into the garage I guess. I slowly peered in hoping damage would be slim but there by a door was a model A Ford with the van snug to it's side. So I took a closer look my hopes clearly shook the relic was a candy apple red The van had rolled in and made a big dent shaped just like a hog's head. Well, I was'nt watching Jim and he slipped in the Van to correct the mistake he'd made tried to back the van up in drive. Yes sir, Jim pushed that car into a wheel barrow one of the handles broke off a light Well, when he finally backed up the van got stuck under the fender on the right. Yep, Jim pulled that off and then got it caught on an electric light cord plugged in of course that was hanging over an open gas can. BLAMMM!!!!!11 WHOOSH BOOM!!! Tell me now Jungle Mouth Jim why'd come to work in a drunken din? My life in heaven seems so blue cause I see my wife at home with you. From this place I'm floating in there's no way to get at you Jim. and I might be an angel but to tell you the truth if I could go back I'd murder you!!! Celtrue2000@E3B1G9 |
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| © Copyright 2000 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
This would make a great Jim Carrey movie perhaps titled "Dead and Deader". ha..ha..James |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Oh my goodness, help...I've started laughing and I can't stop. This was just fabulous...thank you so much for this imaginative story (or was it true?) |
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