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Open Poetry #8
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Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263


0 posted 2000-06-26 01:57 PM



Glist'ning Grass



Along a velvet ribbon'd road
green grasses, downed by soldiers' load
passed o'erhead in moonlit night
a'shining for the everbright

A call to arms brings certain death
for men and grasses, drawing breath
and on green velvet, march they now
in moonshine, through the meadow, plow

In stoic storm the men beset
upon the path to battle, wet,
and drops of sweat bejewell the grass
as men, to war, stride everfast

And casements where their women shed
soft tears of love and drops of dread
below each window, glist'ning grass
beset with gems of sorrow's mass



Dear LadyClaire




© Copyright 2000 Meadowmuse - All Rights Reserved
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
1 posted 2000-06-26 02:01 PM


Simply breathtaking!!!

What vividity in such a brilliant coupling of words... Claire, I am so glad that I read this one...lovely rhyme, enchanting imagery...what can I say, I am searching for words...

regards, sudhir.


Death, be not proud, though some have called thee,
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;

- John Donne

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
2 posted 2000-06-26 02:48 PM


Claire~
An absolute work of art.
So exquisitely painted with such vivid detail.

You're wonderfully talented, Claire.
~*Marge*~


~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



Elizabeth
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Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
3 posted 2000-06-26 05:08 PM


As Sudhir said, breathtaking is the way to describe this. I add the word "vivid" to it too.

Elizabeth


I'm grabbing my hat and coat
I'm leaving the cat a note
Quick call me a ferry boat-getting out of town!



Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
4 posted 2000-06-26 05:10 PM


very sad and beautifully written
I always enjoy reading your poems
you're quite the artist ...
with an eye for detail

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

5 posted 2000-06-26 09:20 PM


Sudhir, I think your search led you to the perfect words, dear sir...and I thank you for taking time to let me know you enjoyed this little poem.

Thank you, Marge, for the warmth of your words on this stormy night!  

Elizabeth (also my middle name  ) I thank you sincerely for letting me know you like this!

Rex, thank you my friend...I am so glad you enjoyed it.  

~ Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
6 posted 2000-06-26 09:27 PM


Claire,

This was a beautiful vision!!!  You have painted such a spellbinding scene with your lovely words.  Liked it a lot.  

Keep up the good work!!  

LW


Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith


Mike
Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462

7 posted 2000-06-27 09:19 AM


It appears you have put me in a reflective mood with your pen this morning.  Beautifully written (goes without saying)...   the certainy of our destiny.


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2000-06-27 11:16 AM


So breathtakingly vivid, Claire...wonderful writing!
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

9 posted 2000-06-27 06:20 PM


Lone Wolf, thank you for the encouraging response to this piece... you are a dear.  

MIke, I hope your reflective mood set your mind toward a peaceful place...thank you for reading, my friend.

Martie, thank you for such kind words!

~ Claire




Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Dr.Moose1
Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA
10 posted 2000-06-27 08:01 PM


Claire,
What can I say , you already know I'm a big fan . How about ...Bravo ! Encore !
Doc

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