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Open Poetry #8
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2000-06-26 03:41 AM


So find for me,
another way...
(I didn't write
it out this way...)
Make it simple
and correct,
as simply as
the stars direct.
Tell me Jesus loves me so...
enough to chop a line of blow.
Enough to tap
air from syringe,
Show me...
I'll begin again.

Break these walls
and ease this pain.
Tell me, I am
worthy--SANE.
Tell me.
Tell me.
Say again.
(Hold me?)
Silence
be my friend.

forgive me
as I
shiver, weep...
I crawl the walls.
I do not sleep.

© Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2000-06-26 10:39 AM


Serenity
That sounds about right to me. Enjoyed the read.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
2 posted 2000-06-26 10:43 AM


Silence
be my friend.
...

liked the lines there and enjoyed the poem too...

Regards, sudhir.

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee,
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;

- John Donne

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-06-26 10:43 AM


So find for me,
another way...
(I didn't write
it out this way...)
Make it simple
and correct,
as simply as
the stars direct.
------------------
Show me...
I'll begin again.

Break these walls
and ease this pain.
Tell me, I am
worthy--SANE.
Tell me.
Tell me.
Say again.
(Hold me?)
Silence
be my friend.

forgive me
as I
shiver, weep...
I crawl the walls.
I do not sleep.
-----------
worthy...YES
sane ... YES
friend ..YES
brave... YES
poet ... YES

sleep now baby...
me loves ya
me



OLIAS
Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090
Pearl city Iowa
4 posted 2000-06-26 10:56 AM


Wow, Serenity this is so powerful.
Strikes straight to the soul.

Regards
Olias.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

5 posted 2000-06-26 11:35 AM


I would like to thank you all for the kind replies.  I sincerely hope that this did not offend anyone...that was not my intention.
My intention was simply to portray drug addiction as a human condition--I hope that I accomplished that.  Again, my apologies if any were offended.

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
6 posted 2000-06-26 12:23 PM


Excellent portrayal of the reality of addiction. Not a fun place to be....

good work!

'if dreams are like movies then memories are films about ghosts'- adam duritz, counting crows


Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2000-06-27 12:13 PM


superb serenity. . . and yes, too often we do forget that side of it all. . . the human side. . . the pain, the loss. . .

thanks for the reminder. . .

-----------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl



Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
8 posted 2000-06-27 12:41 PM


If only those words like fire would spread
before more our children, were junkies dead.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

9 posted 2000-06-27 01:08 AM


Thank you much kindly doreen, your understanding is greatly appreciated.

and me Sveetie---big bear hug please...

Prometheus--First Welcome to the Forum, and ya know, there was a time when I wished that Iwere dead, but now I enjoy sticking around for the simple pleasures of life...like being a pain in the ass...lol.  I sort of stuck around out of spite.  Lol and welcome once again.

EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
10 posted 2000-06-27 01:30 AM


Serenity...I for one was not offnded. I think you portrayed it very well.



God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Unknown



redheart angrybraids
Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 410
honolulu, hawaii
11 posted 2000-06-27 01:34 PM


this was really hard to read, because of the emotions it brings up, i haven't touched this road with my feet, but i have walked down it with more than a friend, and it's so much intensity, i had to leave, sick know more in momment, i pray that my love does not become a slave again, we have walked all this way, yes my life is crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy, and i should've probably wrote an email instead, cause i'm going on and on, but, over all the fits of my own experience, i do love the poem, it's self, all that you write is real like when you wake up in the morning.
kindly, and truly a friend of some kind,
redheart angrybraids

Kindly,
Redheart Angrybraids

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
12 posted 2000-06-27 01:55 PM


we all do different things to ease the pain, some people get sucked in. powerful serenity, very powerful.

"but for the lovers, their arms Round the griefs of the ages, Who pay no praise or wages Nor heed my craft or art"
Dylan Thomas.

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