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Open Poetry #8
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ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin

0 posted 2000-06-23 04:32 AM


I've lived, I've Loved, I've fallen through
each time just worse... I see, it's true

I've laughed, I've cried, I've given all
been pushed away then begged to crawl

For what? for Love? to try again?
so I can be that loving friend?

I've tried, I've been, gave forth my heart
I cared, I came, right from the start

I've done it right, been real and true
walked straight, held tight, and stayed it through

I've lost, been hurt, without a "why"
each time, inside, cant help but cry

Why fear? why fright? let me see "you"
It's hard, I know, but I'm showing too

It happens time and time again
will there be Love without "the end"?

I fear with all I feel inside
I cant within someone confide

I've closed myself, put up a wall
afraid of hurt, the dreaded "fall"

How can I someday hope to find
the one who could subdue my mind

If fear, defense, and lack of trust
hold me so tight I hide... I must

Now Love is knocking at my door
and I'm afraid to give once more

Afraid of hurt, afraid of pain
afraid I'll lose my heart again

I want to do it so bad it hurts
but now I'm them, I'm scared, I'm first

Can it be true? can it be real?
can I not Love with how I feel?

It's all still there, I still know how
but I cant freely give it now

I hope this passes, it's just a phase
'cause I want to Love 'till my last days.
< !signature-->

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.


[This message has been edited by ThUnDeRkYsS (edited 06-23-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 B.J.Howe - All Rights Reserved
angelswing
Senior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 705
United Kingdom
1 posted 2000-06-23 04:49 AM


Great poem, I really enjoyed it, it flowed really well and had a very true to life story . I think we all feel like this at some point, but love always bounces back, making every thing change . In the words of Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber - 'Love, Love changes everything' .
Loved it .
L.of.L. Tom .


Insanity is a perfectly normal responce to an abnormal world -R.D.Laing.-

notlikely2
Member
since 2000-06-16
Posts 308
UK
2 posted 2000-06-23 05:35 AM


Superb poetry!
I loved this one. I have felt like this many times....but the pain is just part of the journey we have to travel to reach a better place.
The destination makes it worthwhile...believe it.



Love is like the measles.....the older you are, the harder it hits you!

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
3 posted 2000-06-23 06:19 PM


Thank you both very much for your kind replies... and yes, the destination always seems worth it all... 'till it is gone.  Thanks again

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2000-06-23 06:24 PM


I don't understand how you could resist Love...if it is really Love...and if it is one you also desire...a mutual attraction.  You would not want to live with the thought that you should have at least given it a try.  Am I right?    James

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
5 posted 2000-06-23 08:06 PM


you penned you feelings
very well in this piece! excellent
emotion, wonderful intensity and
fustration. i've too been where you are
and i agree it's very hard. just because
we want to love, doesn't mean it's always
easy. but i do believe you shall find
love again and the next time it will be
there to stay.
take care.
excellent poem.
amy  

"Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends."

"Fate exists but it can only take you so far,
Because once you're there
It's up to you to make it happen."




ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
6 posted 2000-06-23 11:10 PM


Thank you for kind words jmlee and Aimster... how can I resist Love?  I am in a state where I am not ready to give myself again, a state I used to end my pain and hopefully let myself heal.  I DO want to Love again but I cant because I am too afraid to lose everything again; to have my heart torn out agian; to go trough all the pain and unwillingness to let go of something that is gone... again.  Hopefully I will get over it, but that is why.
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