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Open Poetry #8
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I Lie Awake and Wait
| Open Poetry #8 |
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I Lie Awake and Wait |
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Jan Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 114 |
I lie awake and wait, each breath thick with summer's heat. Damp hair and skin pressed against a wrinkled sheet. In the distance lightening leaps, an angry dance across the earth. Until, finally, the sky begins to weep. I lie awake and wait. Cool clean rain falls heavily, then runs silently, past my open window pane before settling comfortably to the floor. As the curtain rushes in, my skin tingles in the cool night air. In my relief I forget for a moment, that it is he, not you, lying there. Your thoughts are not of open windows, or of water sliding down the wall, I more than mere shadows in your presence I am real. We lay together and listen. I see love, like the rain and moonlight on your face, glisten and I no longer wait. He gets up to close the window, locking out the beauty of the night, and like the colours of the wind I am never truly in his sight. As the window closes you slip from my side and I am here again with him left with nothing, without pride, to nurse the ache that comes to me when you go. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jan - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Jan* You used fantastic imagery in this piece I loved the feel of the rain and the sight of the lightening...a storm is one of my favorite moments. The pain touched on in piece was also just as strong as the storm an awesome read Jan, thank you for sharing this~ |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Yes, Jan, I too liked the storm idea. Nice work. Elizabeth I'm grabbing my hat and coat I'm leaving the cat a note Quick call me a ferry boat-getting out of town! |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Jan something about the rain i tell ya. this really struck a chord with me beautiful writing. look forward to reading more from you! take care. amy  "Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends." "Fate exists but it can only take you so far, Because once you're there It's up to you to make it happen." |
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Jan Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 114 |
Thanks all. I love a good storm! But I am glad that that particular storm was last year! |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
This is a wonderful piece of writing, im very envious, you have painted pictures on the canvas of my empty mind, thankyou for sharing this with me Olias |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
As the curtain rushes in, my skin tingles in the cool night air. In my relief I forget for a moment, that it is he, not you, lying there. --------------- He gets up to close the window, locking out the beauty of the night, and like the colours of the wind I am never truly in his sight. As the window closes you slip from my side and I am here again with him left with nothing, without pride, to nurse the ache that comes to me when you go. ----------------- oh man.... i cant believe i just read this... you must be a mind reader... no, a heart reader.. this is such a cool poem.. the imagery is SO great and perfect but it is the ACHE of emotions and the realities of this situation you have written so well that effect me deeply welcome to Passions Jan (great name)  I look VERY forward to more of your work jm It's amazing How you make your face just like a wall How you take your heart and turn it off How I turn my head and you lose it all ... And it's unnerving (How one move just puts me by myself) There you go just trusting someone else (Now I know I put us both through hell) ... I'm not sayin That there was nothing wrong (I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me) And I'm not sayin (We ever had the right to hold on) (I just didn't wanna let you get away from me) ~MB20~ She says baby, It's 3AM ... I must be lonely, When she says baby, Well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes, Says the rains gonna wash away I believe it. ~MB20~ |
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Jan Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 114 |
JM Thank you! I always kept my poetry completely to myself, posting here has been a very cool experience for me. I have read your work over the last few weeks and it is incredible!!! Never Learn just broke my heart. |
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