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Open Poetry #8
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Thinking in the rain
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Thinking in the rain |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium 
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Dear friends, I continue with thoughts on India, and am reminded that now the monsoon season would have just started...briging me up to this one This sort of makes it two poems about rain and monsoon thoughts (the previous one was ...dance in the rain ...if you remember) This one is more in the same trend of cleasing one's soul but a bit different. I hope you like this one. I always felt appreciated here, and I am very much thankful for that.... Enjoy... Thanks in advance, sudhir. ---------------***------------------------------***--------------- Thinking In The Rain Giant clouds screamed out, terribly upset, In the distance, lightning blazed - a slap, Gusty winds had shaken their calm state, A deep-throated growl, a mighty thunderclap, Dragon-faced dark clouds began their assault, Furious, wild terror, struck with their wet wings, A parched, summer earth seemed to be at fault, Raindrops, small and large, fell; drew rounded rings. Puffs of dust from the cracked loose soil, Render her breathless, puddles take circled forms, With vision of mud and scent of musk, she uncoils - Sings harvest songs with beats of raindrop drums. Nature announces a change, from summer to monsoon, In fertile lands of the sublime Temperate Zone, With virgin maiden's breath comes the farmer's boon, Fresh grassy hair she combs a cosmic green tone Deep clouds still hang from mountaintops, As the sun peeps through the tall trees, A forest dense with velvety green props, Radiant with the rays, gleeful smile he frees. Across the misty green monsoon shroud An apparition seen amongst crowded clouds As I submit myself to a beauty rare A peacock holds out a rainbow fair. A beacon lit up from peacock feathers, Held me up, showed me the way of right, Dark clouds of doubt and guilt wither, Seven colours blended, divinely bright. [This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 06-19-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
WOW SUD!!!! your imagery here is amazing... I have seen such a growth in your poetry in painting such strong and perfect imagery this is one of your best. great writing take care poet-friend jm |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thank you Janet, thanks a lot... you are very kind. I am happy to note that I have grown as a writer...and its all due to this place and beautiful people like you...I've learnt a lot... Thanks.  regards, sudhir. |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Sudhir, WOW each line is so beautifully expressed painting an image with such clarity that I felt i could reach out and touch it. Wonderful. Each line is perfection. < !signature--> ------------------------ "WE IRISH ARE TOO POETIC TO BE POETS, WE ARE A NATION OF BRILLIANT FAILURES." Oscar Wilde. A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry [This message has been edited by brian madden (edited 06-19-2000).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
See? the dust is beaten back into its clay round the liquid drops are an image of them stay and dwell then ancient lands grasses to spring verdant animals will roam grand and listen to the birds' chant (~,^) another tale, well told well spun, robe of gold. Sunshine ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Wow,...I am astounded, this poem holds such beauty. I mean that. This is such an awesome poem. I love to read ones about nature and by golly....this is superb. Take care. *Peace. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
brian, thanks as always for your kind words, ego fired up, I am gloating now Thanks a lot...Karilea, Thanks a lot for your ever-appreciative words. I bow humbly with gratitude pouring from this heart... SpitFire, Thanks a lot, I am very glad that you liked this poem... by the way, does any of you think this is worth submitting for the book, I am not very sure, so help me in deciding please... Thanks again and many regards, Sudhir |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Definately worthy,...very much so for that matter. *Peace. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thanks SpitFire for your encouragement...I think I will do it right away then... I was trying to decide if too many posts for the book might be bad on my part or not... this will be my third then. I have already submitted 1 poem and 1 prose so far... Anyway, lets see if this is worth a try, and if this actually is liked by many wonderful passionate poets here... Even otherwise, my writing this has given me immense pleasure, as it always does, and added pleasure of all of your encouragements and appreciations and critics will add lots of value to this piece... Thanks again. |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
This was great!!!!! Ya had me hook line and sinker the whole way...I was totally enraptured by thie poem.  ~Heather |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You've got my vote...especially when they all read as yours do...when they continue to inspire others... Sunshine ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
"With vision of mud and scent of musk, she uncoils - Sings harvest songs with beats of raindrop drums." Sudhir, what a delicate, vivid piece of writing. One can feel the rain approach, feel the cold, wet drenching, feel the deepening of the deepest colors of nature...just wonderful, thank you for this gifting. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Heather, Thanks a lot for your encouraging and kind words... Karilea, You are being so kind...little me inspiring...what a feeling!!! Claire, Thanks a lot for describing exactly how you feel with this poem... I am glad to have brought out that feeling... Regards to all, Sudhir |
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JulieAnn Senior Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 754Earth 3rd Rock from the sun!! |
Very good and discriptive...I lived on a tropical island for several years and this brought back a few memories of some of the weather they get over there...very well expressed!!!  Julie :) |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Wow Sudhir...wow... well done again! Awesome stuff my friend... You have a way of depicting the world that is enviable... K |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Stunning imagery ... simply exquisite. I am in awe Sudhir, absolutely beautiful! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Ah, good man...you've got my vote! Sunshine ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
JulieAnn, Glad that I could bring back memories, and thank you for your appreciative words Kamla, Thanks for the Wows, my friend. Kit, Wow for your high words of praise. Thanks Karilea, Did you just vote twice??? hmmmm just wondering... |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
Another vivid example of your wonderful talent my friend....you can count my vote as well All my love, Jeffrey I lie awake in a world filled with dreams, but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thanks Jeffrey, you are being very kind... regards, sudhir |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Wonderful poem, enjoyed the read very much. Sy |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
This is an amazing poem, my friend. Storms come alive with your pen, take on character and personality, and as always in your poetry, much emotion. Your verses are more highly charged than a monsoon. Nice to see your photo Liz |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Seymour, I am very glad that you enjoyed this one... Liz, I am honoured by your very kind words... regards, sudhir |
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