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Open Poetry #8
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Guess! (Title withheld)
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Guess! (Title withheld) |
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WhiteNite Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 241Montgomery, AL 
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One last dance together? You know one is never enough. Promise as you may, you just can't leave her touch. I wish I knew the words, that could banish this lovely spell. I wish I knew the words, to help you say "farewell" I'd burn all the memories, and never think of her again. But I can't cover this hole, and noone else fits in. So you stare up at me and bleed, reminding me that you're there. I promise you there's better, but you just don't seem to care. You only want that one, you can't see through your pain. You only want that one, because noone else is the same. Yes, I ripped her from your core, I swear it was for your own good. Just give this one a chance, I'd do it for you if I could. I show you all the differences, but you just won't readjust. If I could take back one act, that "love" I'd never trust. --Dave < !signature--> "Don't let your character get camoflaged with your environment. Find who you are and let it stay in its true colors." --Rachel Joy Scott [This message has been edited by WhiteNite (edited 06-18-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Dave - All Rights Reserved | ||||
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Hi Dave. Oh Boy a Game ---but should we post we would spoil this poem without a name. Great Poem, Dave ------- ~netswan |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
OH MAN... OH MAN AGAIN ... ok..first of all...your in big trouble mister why you make me WAIT so long to have a poem from you... ok, i forgive you *smile*... and YOU KNOW I LOVE this one ... One last dance together? You know one is never enough. Promise as you may, you just can't leave her touch. ------------------ I'd burn all the memories, and never think of her again. But I can't cover this hole, and noone else fits in. So you stare up at me and bleed, reminding me that you're there. I promise you there's better, but you just don't seem to care. You only want that one, you can't see through your pain. You only want that one, because no one else is the same. -------------------- Just give this one a chance, I'd do it for you if I could. -------------------- If I could take back one act, that "love" I'd never trust. --------------- this is so cool and so YOU and reads like a song lyric!! I think I will withhold my guess... i have an unfair advantage..  DONT MAKE ME WAIT SO LONG FOR THE NEXT ONE!!! later sweet-dave-gator jm It's amazing How you make your face just like a wall How you take your heart and turn it off How I turn my head and you lose it all ... And it's unnerving (How one move just puts me by myself) There you go just trusting someone else (Now I know I put us both through hell) ... I'm not sayin That there was nothing wrong (I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me) And I'm not sayin (We ever had the right to hold on) (I just didn't wanna let you get away from me) ~MB20~ She says baby, It's 3AM ... I must be lonely, When she says baby, Well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes, Says the rains gonna wash away I believe it. ~MB20~ |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I love this poem, Dave. Not sure my guess is right so I'll wait to read what the others say!  |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
Look at all these chickens in here unwilling to guess! ROFL Uh...I think I'll keep my ideas to myself too.  Sir, this is really a good piece of writing, when you consider how much of your heart went into it. I have indeed missed seeing you around. I'm suppose to be the one who is so busy, not you! LOL Last I heard, you were off to some strip club to dance??? No wonder it took you so long to return! hehehe Email me sometime, would ya? ( I know, why do YOU have to make the first move?) LOL Take care boy! "Fantasies enrich our lives to the fullest, but true satisfaction comes from creating your own story in the real world! Live out your fantasies & make a storybook with beautiful pictures for the world to enjoy! -poetFemme |
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WhiteNite Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 241Montgomery, AL |
Thank you all for replying. I'll post the full poem with it's title in a new thread after this reply. netswan - Thank you. Wish ya would have played the game but oh well.. obviously it wasn't a good one anyways. Noone else wanted to play. I just noticed as I was reading over it that it could be read in two different ways.. then a third... just wanted to see if anyone else could come up with a different story behind it. =) Anyways..... rambling... as usual. =) Jan - I'm sowwy.  I didn't mean to be gone so long. Just been.... busy I guess. Missed ya though. I've been checking ICQ for you and haven't been able to catch you. Glad you liked the poem.PdV - Thanks you. I'm glafd you enjoyed it... nd nooen else is guessing, so GUESS!!!!!!! J/K Oh So Sweet Gen - Thank you... but it wasn't from the heart really... it was from the mind... (snicker) Refer to the full poem posted now. I went to a strip club to dance? Me???? Well... maybe once....... anyways.. no that's not where I went. But man... maybe I should stay gone more often. It seems I have more of a life (at leasst by the rumor mill here) than I do when I'm here. =) I have E-mailed you... now make the second move and REPLY! =) Missed you too."Don't let your character get camoflaged with your environment. Find who you are and let it stay in its true colors." --Rachel Joy Scott |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Well I haven't seen the full poem yet, but I think this is about two people who are dating and the guy wants to break up with the girl because the girl is trying to come between him and someone else (maybe a friend who isn't a real friend or someone trying to steal him away that he is tempted by). Well those are just my thoughts on what this poem is about. Guess now I'd better find the rest of this! Elizabeth I'm grabbing my hat and coat I'm leaving the cat a note Quick call me a ferry boat-getting out of town! |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
Well no matter what the others are saying about "who's and what's" I am truly moved by this piece. Wonderful writing.  ~Heather |
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