navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #3 » Sweet Dreams, My Child
Teen Poetry #3
Post A Reply Post New Topic Sweet Dreams, My Child Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
peanogrl83
Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 202


0 posted 2001-01-06 06:52 PM


Horrendous.
Vreni

Sweet Dreams, My Child

Silver banners reflect cold eyes,
Walls of silence absorb the lies.
Excessive rage falls down dead
Eaten through with molten lead.
Trifle’s tapestry now returns,
Displayed by genius left unburned.
Resentful moths parade about
Exquisite finery of self-doubt.  
Ambling laughter’s drunken path,
Marooned by lord Zeus’s wrath.
Salty ribbons festoon desire
Mistress Rage lays lit afire.
Youngest yet the newborn hope,
Crumpled mass, unfit to cope.
Humor’s eyes remain so shut,
Injured egos deflate, now cut.
Languished pride’s total twist,
Dried confusion it assists.    


© Copyright 2001 peanogrl83 - All Rights Reserved
lilpoet
Member
since 2000-12-30
Posts 55
Dallas,Tx
1 posted 2001-01-06 07:35 PM



I'm a little confused on this poem, but maybe it's because I'm only 15 and I don't know very many of those BIG words yet.  But I'm sure whatever they meant that this was a wonderful poem.  All poems are wonderful.  And I think that if you can write poetry with BIG words then you have much talent.


~If I had a star for everytime you made me smile, I'd be holding the entire midnight sky in my hands~

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-01-06 09:31 PM


Wonderful poem. I think that from now on i will count how many words I do not know within the poem. HEY I URGE YOU ALL TO DO THE SAME!!!

ATTENTION ATTENTION!!!!

When anybody reads Vreni's poems.....I'm going to put a number of how many words I didn't understand due to the vocabulary issue I got going on....so if you want, do it too! haha.

today's number is....4

Anyway good one here vreni!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
3 posted 2001-01-06 10:33 PM


total number is: 2  

What I don't understand is all this hate.  I've talked to you Vreni, and it seems like you have a nice world you live in.  Well, I guess we are never satisfied with what we have.  

Keep em coming....

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


IsGona
Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

4 posted 2001-01-06 11:29 PM


LOL  Dopey, your always starting something.  Your right though I usualy need a dictionary handy when I read Vreni's poems.

You have great talent Vreni, and you have a tremendous vocab.  Love your work. This one is great.  You write with such emotion.  Anyhow great poem.
Jason

oh yeah and learned 3 new words... thanks!

Suga_Baby
Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380
Maine, USA
5 posted 2001-01-06 11:29 PM


Grand total: 3 *LOL*

Good work, here! *claps*  

Allan Riverwood
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
6 posted 2001-01-06 11:34 PM


I feel smart-- didn't learn a single new word!  ^_^
Great poem, Vreni.  I didn't expect that type of poem from the title, but it was a pleasant surprise.

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
7 posted 2001-01-07 01:15 PM


As usual this is very well done, thanks for sharing this!  And for Dopey's sake, my total was 2   

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
8 posted 2001-01-07 03:55 PM


great poem.. Im also a little confused
but the rhyme was great and i hope to read more of your "horrendous" work
total #= 4
best wishes

~JDR

"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
9 posted 2001-01-07 09:10 PM


Apparently, everybody knows more words than me!!!!!! *cowers under his desk*

GEEESH!
I don't like this anymore! haha



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #3 » Sweet Dreams, My Child

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary