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Child of Wisdom
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Child of Wisdom |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg 
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As I said, looking around this place really has inspired me to write more frequently! As a matter of fact, just a few minutes ago I wrote a poem! I was excited to be able to share it with you... so here goes. I hope you don't mind me posting two in a day, by the way. But this place is so great! A tear of passion burns the eye for all the love I've never known A tear of passion rakes the sky to which I've looked, to where I've grown A tear of passion hits the floor and tears shall fall not anymore A child of wisdom reads a book with faith in question, then in death A child of wisdom takes a look at all his life, and draws a breath A child of wisdom makes a choice and learns to speak with his own voice Destination not unseen yet still within the clouds it throbs laced with all the things I've been and torn to bits by demon mobs I fall to knees, and start to cry a child of wisdom once was I [This message has been edited by Allan Riverwood (edited 01-05-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Brian James Lee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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IsGona Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723 |
I'm glad this place could inspire you to write such a great poem. Your going to love it here. "Every body has their destiny... I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN ~Hatebreed~ |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Glad to hear you're enjoying this forum so much! You just wrote this poem in a few minutes? It's well written in my opinion, I saw a transformation going on in it. Posting two poems is fine by the way, the limit they suggest is three. I think you are going to add a lot here, I hope you keep coming back for a long time. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Thanks, Lake. I think it's obvious that I'm gonna be spending lots of time here. I hope that I live up to your expectations! |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
I like, I like!  Glad this place inspires you so much!! Don't stop posting!!  ~*Rhonda "I am Canadian" - Joe If you set limitations upon yourself, it's no wonder you fall short of your dreams - Rhonda J. Adolph |
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GirlsBestFriend Member
since 2000-12-27
Posts 71Planet Earth |
well this one....I like it especially the ending. best wishes! ~lots of luv "Isn't it funny how to the world you are nothing? But then to one person..you're the world" |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Allan, this was awesome. I love the last line because it completes the final thought. Wow, I really liked this one. Shows that you have an immense amount of talent. Wonderful job! Wow..... Anyway hey.......expectations? Why on earth would you have to live up to expectations? NO need pal....no need at all........feel free to post, or reply anything.....we will become your friends and you ours. If I have one expectation out of you it's this: Stay here and keep contributing your thoughts.....I like them.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
As long as youre posting incredible poems such as these, you can post 100's a day for all I care... ...the rhyme scheme was great and you did a great job writing this poem The thoughts expressed were really cool and when you reflected back upon your life, it created more of a dramatic scene This poem reflects what your youth was like? correct? well I hope that now you're feeling better and this writing will also help Im so glad to see that you liked this forum so much! good luck.... and best wishes ~JDR "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
What a wonderful post Allen ... both in your note, and the lovely sentiments and wisdom of this poem. Beautiful thoughts, and splendid form ... you're a terrific addition to our family of poets, and we're so pleased you're enjoying your stay. Hope to read more! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I feel so loved! Thanks everyone! |
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Melster Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442Brisbane, Qld, Australia |
What a beautiful peice of work... this is the first I have read of yours, the other is down the list a little and I Like it very much... I look forward to seeing more!! Melz!! Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly |
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TrueLUV Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 158Connecticut, U.S.A. |
I can honestly say that this might have been one of the best poems I've ever read Iam adding this to my collection. Keep up the great work |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Allan: This is a great piece of writing. Its good to see that a group of people all with the same intentions in mind, to write great poetry, can inspire a person so much. I think we all know what you mean when you say that you love this place. I don't think I have read any of your pieces and I am glad that this was the first I saw. The structure of the poem was great. Keep up the good work. ~AF~ "Poetry is the language in which man explores his own amazement." Christopher Fry |
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Greeneyes617 Member
since 2000-11-22
Posts 329Arkansas |
WoW....this is really good Allan. Thanks for posting it. [This message has been edited by Greeneyes617 (edited 01-05-2001).] |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Im really glad to hear that this place inspires you. Im also glad that you decided to post this poem. It was excellent...keep em comin! |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
you are one amazing writer. Very talented if I may say. All the poems of yours that 've read are all extraordinary. truthfully, i've been amazed with all of em. I agree with Jeremy, I too don't care if you post 100. unfortunately, we're only allowed so much in a day I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
I'm really impressed by this one! Keep up the good work, Allan, and I'll keep reading. <3 |
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