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Desecration of a soul
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Desecration of a soul |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
A painful existence, The experience of life or death. Which one would you choose? Which one would bring the most happiness? Picture perfect emotions, Of a blackened soul, Aren't even there, In the struggle for life. Once it can be abused, The mending process; forever, The moment it begins to learn again, Is the instant you wonder why you let it in again. Human life is nothing but pain. The image of life is disgusting, In the eyes of the beholder, Nothing is as it seems. You think people as a whole, Can be trusted. Your space is your own, Not for the entire population to use. Why is it they have trouble understanding? The language cannot be communicated. Instead I am left to look at pictures of black, And shades of only grey. Constantly the struggle lives on, Portraying a grassier side to life. The touch is too far to grasp, Once again, nothing is as it seems. Simple thoughts turn to nightmares, In the field of burning. There is a moment of complete silence, Then the hellish creature emerge from the mountains. It is humanity, Seeking to destroy all it can find. All I want to do is kill it, End the suffering that it tends to bring. It won't give up though, Pounding what little life I have into the ground. Once again, I am nothing, Another dot in a spectrum of colours. The struggle in my head continues, As nothing I behold is special anymore. Its been demolished into nothing, Not even music can bring it back to life. To handle this once again, Is something only a dreamer can see. The fire in me died along with my sanity, Its bright flame now extinguished. The rest of me wonders, Hopelessly in a daze. My bountiful life I once held in a hand, Now lays shattered on the tear sodden ground. It is such a struggle to live, Yet leaving the world is too hard also. To descend into a spiral of nothingness, Looks like the best option. For a girl who has nothing left to live for... |
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| © Copyright 2001 Elizabeth Johnson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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mikeykrazy Junior Member
since 2000-12-20
Posts 37U.S.A |
all i have to say is ddddaaaammmmm!!!!!!!!!! the poem is grate. and the thing with Then the hellish creature emerge from the mountains. It is humanity, Seeking to destroy all it can find. All I want to do is kill it, End the suffering that it tends to bring. It won't give up though, Pounding what little life I have into the ground. Once again, I am nothing, Another dot in a spectrum of colours. that hole part right there is my last year in 8th grade loved it mikeykrazy p.s. i feeal that i have to say this don't kill yourself i know what that is like just don't and e-mail me if you need a ear to talk to my aim name is "mikeykraz" and my icq # is on the flower near my icon |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
You've expressed yourself with such vivid imagery Anonymousfemale, and your poem is very well done. I will remind you that we have guidelines against condoning or glorifying suicide, and although I am concerned with your ending, you do note: "Yet leaving the world is too hard also." I felt you were exploring more in this poem, the struggle of understanding the horrors that mankind perpetuates on themselves. It is difficult to sit back and watch and wonder what has happened to society, and yet ... if we are moved to the point where we do notice this ... then this helps us to stand up and fight against it. We are each only one, but together, we can make a difference and make this world better. You really got me pondering with this poem AnonymousFemale ... I hope all is well with you, and I've interpreted this somewhat reasonably. E-mail me directly if you need to talk, and take care of yourself. Best wishes, /Kit |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Kit: Sorry if I seemed to glorify suicide as that was not my intention. It was simply saying that everything inside me has died, not myself as a physical being wants to die. ~AF~ "Poetry is the language in which man explores his own amazement." Christopher Fry |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
wonderful post it was very intriguing and right to the point i especially liked "My bountiful life I once held in a hand, Now lays shattered on the tear sodden ground." that was a very imaginative scene you described keep up the good work best wishes, ~JDR< !signature--> "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde [This message has been edited by jeremydraul (edited 01-02-2001).] |
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Skyfire 
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
Woah. Deep. I'm not used to thinking like that made me think. Way to go!   ~*Rhonda "I am Canadian" - Joe If you set limitations upon yourself, it's no wonder you fall short of your dreams - Rhonda J. Adolph |
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Pixie-Babe03 Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387Central Maine |
DANG!!! this is great!!! you seem to have expressed you emotions perfectly, this is a very vivid poem, wonderful job!! ~*Pixie*~ |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Thanks AF ... I'm glad you clarified this for me, and do hope that things will get better for you. Should you ever wish to talk, please do feel free to e-mail me directly. Best wishes and hugs to you, /Kit |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Wow this was deep but i surely hope that things get better for you! Do write more and post! Let us know how you're doing!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
People: Thanks for all the replies. The frame of mind has not improved..In fact it has gotten alot worse. You know when things just don't ever go right? Well amplify that by about 20 and you'll see the situation. Once again, thanks for the replies.... ~AF~ "Poetry is the language in which man explores his own amazement." Christopher Fry |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Well you certainly don't make what's going on in your life sound pleasent. I hope you can cope with everything and that things begin to turn for the better. This poem has gotten my thoughts going about humanity. Great job of writing on this one "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I understand what you are saying, and your poem is excellently written, but i don't understand your portrayal of Humanity as a beast-- some humanity can be beastly, agreed, but can't others serve to "slay" this beast? If this doesn't make sense, understand! hehehe Still, i can relate to your feelings... fear of life and fear of death equally. What a sad state of affairs. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Im actually on my kneww right now bowing to you. Your expression of your feelings is very strong. bravo!!! I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
heya eJ ...i decided to do an in-depth reply somewhat, like you do  "A painful existence, The experience of life or death. Which one would you choose? Which one would bring the most happiness?" you have questioned the real existence of our being in these lines...as we dont know exactly in the unknown on how it looks yet we know how it feels. "Once it can be abused, The mending process; forever," true...we can be wounded but the healing of that scar seems like "forever"...very well said. "Your space is your own, Not for the entire population to use. Why is it they have trouble understanding?" such realistic lines...i to wonder why we are limited...esp in perception. "Once again, nothing is as it seems. Simple thoughts turn to nightmares," Damn...can that be said better?.... "Once again, I am nothing, Another dot in a spectrum of colours." how you feel is SO well discribed through the imagery...wOW. "Not even music can bring it back to life." to me that examplifies the hoplessness...cause music to me is a place i am free...well at least until the music stops!...and thats when reality sets in. "To descend into a spiral of nothingness, Looks like the best option. For a girl who has nothing left to live for..." powerful last lines that is crying in a desperate need for direction. overall...i LOVED this piece...came straight from the heart and is VERy deep and a piece that was written just from you yet for the world to hear the voice of your existence...amazing...and a piece i can relate. ps- you should be VERY happy LOL...cause my longest reply...you have just percieved! [This message has been edited by anonymous albert ? (edited 09-09-2001).] |
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