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Teen Poetry #3
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mikeykrazy
Junior Member
since 2000-12-20
Posts 37
U.S.A

0 posted 2001-01-02 12:38 PM


this just came to me out of nowhere. it is about my life and my experiences with girlfriends and sorry about the miss spellings

I STOPP
and pause from this madness

I STEP BACK
and look at myself

I AM AWAKENED
bye the tuch of this new one

I SEE
the glowing face of her butey

I WANT
nothing more than her

I STILL SEEK
her and will for ever

I HOLD
her in my arms

I WEAP
bucause i let her go

I YELL IN JOY
she has returned

I WEAP AGIAN
she has left me for ever



© Copyright 2001 Matt - All Rights Reserved
Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
1 posted 2001-01-02 12:40 PM


I really like this one. The ending is sad, but life is sad at times, ain't it? Keep it up, eh?

~*Skyfire


"I am Canadian" - Joe
If you set limitations upon yourself, it's no wonder you fall short of your dreams - Rhonda J. Adolph

mikeykrazy
Junior Member
since 2000-12-20
Posts 37
U.S.A
2 posted 2001-01-02 02:09 AM


do you guys not like my poem well... fine... bye...

thing happen in life that just need a poem. then ther poems just for the heack of it.

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
3 posted 2001-01-02 06:54 AM


Very nice concept and form MikeyCrazy ... I like the way you started each stanza. I hope you will soon "yell in joy" again!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
4 posted 2001-01-02 02:44 PM


interesting concept of this topic
i liked the escalation
    and the downfall for that fact.. except that it was a sad ending...
great post and no one can HATE a poem, it just isnt possible
best wishes,

~JDR

"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde

mikeykrazy
Junior Member
since 2000-12-20
Posts 37
U.S.A
5 posted 2001-01-02 04:59 PM


i don't know where the format for this poem came from it just came out of me.  thanks for the replys
Pixie-Babe03
Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387
Central Maine
6 posted 2001-01-02 05:19 PM


great work   i love the format of this, wonderful writing, i hope to see mroe soon!!
~*Pixie*~

DreamerGrl27
Member
since 2000-10-29
Posts 142

7 posted 2001-01-02 09:20 PM


I loved this! It was really creative...I loved how you showed all the phases and everything...the format was really unique.
Good job!

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
8 posted 2001-01-03 12:35 PM


I liked this a lot. I think the best part of the poem is the formatting along with the general message. Nice one here


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
9 posted 2001-01-04 11:19 AM


mikeykrazy, you need to give some of us slower people time to get here before you decide we don't like the poem!  I agree that this is very creative and I also like the way it is written.  Thanks for sharing it with us!   < !signature-->

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com




[This message has been edited by Lakewalker (edited 01-04-2001).]

xShUgArHiGhx
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Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
10 posted 2001-01-05 01:17 PM


Very creative poem! I really liked this a lot! And yea i agree with Lakewalker...give us some time man!! Im a lil slow on the replying but as you see...a lotta people loved your poem...your talented and your creative..keep em comin hun.

Allan Riverwood
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
11 posted 2001-01-05 01:21 PM


The format for this poem caught my eye.  You did a nice job of working with an unusual style of poem.  It turned out very nicely.  I enjoyed it.
IsGona
Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

12 posted 2001-01-05 01:37 PM


New style, godd message... Great poem.
Jason

"Every body has their destiny...
I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN
~Hatebreed~

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