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Child of the Stars
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since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

0 posted 2000-12-27 09:22 PM



   Kay, here's my try at Lakewalker's famous challenge.

     fIrEpLaCe


Eyes lost within flame
symphony of heat and light
coals burn my silence

© Copyright 2000 Carly Anne Van Dort - All Rights Reserved
Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

1 posted 2000-12-27 10:13 PM


This is really good, there's not many haikus on this site  .  I'm a little confused as to Lakewalkers challenge.....good job tho!
Bel

Alwye
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Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
2 posted 2000-12-27 10:25 PM


Very beautiful Haiku!  I could picture the flame perfectly.  Well done!

*Krista Knutson*

I'm a slow dying flower
In a frost-killing hour
The sweet turning sour and untouchable...
-Natalie Merchant

kaile
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since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
3 posted 2000-12-27 11:56 PM


im impressed..this was a very good first attempt....well done and i look forward to reading more
Melster
Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442
Brisbane, Qld, Australia
4 posted 2000-12-28 02:38 AM


Great work...  this challenge is really catching on  it must be contagious!!  

Melz!!


Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly

IsGona
Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

5 posted 2000-12-28 10:23 AM


Great job Carly.  I think this was wonderful

"Every body has their destiny...
I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN
~Hatebreed~

Child of the Stars
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Ann Arbor, MI
6 posted 2000-12-28 12:54 PM



   Thanks peeps for the replies

   ~Carly

WhY
ShOuLd I
Be hypnotized by someone else's lies
WhY
ShOuLd I
Take time and pride in what someone else believes...

jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
7 posted 2000-12-28 11:57 PM


wow, awesome work! haikus are pretty fun.

jeremy r

"A writer doesn't acquire a vacancy of mind, but rather a inadequacy of words." - Jeremy D. Raulinaitis

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
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Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
8 posted 2000-12-29 12:51 PM


outstanding...one of the best haikus i've read in passions...keep em coming    you are very talented  

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
9 posted 2000-12-29 04:04 PM


Awesome job, I could see it all and the last line, great.  Bel: (I dunno if she'll read this but oh well) in the Teen Explorer forum I had a post challenging people to write in the form of a haiku or senryu.  I'd say Carly has certainly met the challenge

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
10 posted 2000-12-29 05:44 PM


Wow this was deep and powerful. Wonderful haiku carly!


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


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