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Teen Poetry #3
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silvrduck
Member
since 2000-11-05
Posts 146


0 posted 2000-12-27 01:01 PM


curse you
and your simple way
cause it is my head
with which you decide to play
you’re changing me too
going one by one
and I’m scared to know
you’ve only just begun.

I know you love him
well honey, I do too
so don’t say such things
cause I can’t hurt you
don’t cry of jealousy
it hurts me inside
don’t say he wants me
with you I wish to abide.

no man to destroy us
thought we knew that before
maybe you forgot
but I’m not the fool anymore
I know what you’re doing
testing me to see
well friend, I’m hurting
I thought you trusted me.
< !signature-->


*The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else.*


[This message has been edited by silvrduck (edited 12-27-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 silvrduck - All Rights Reserved
keoni
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC
1 posted 2000-12-27 01:33 PM


Very nice and I really liked the ending
I know what you’re doing
testing me to see
well friend, I’m hurting
I thought you trusted me.

                                          Jon

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258
meet Morgana
2 posted 2000-12-27 01:37 PM


Excellent poem and a very good ending.  

Live and let live.

~*SeLf PrOcLaImEd FrEaK oF nAtUrE*~


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
3 posted 2000-12-27 03:43 PM


Sounds like a tough situation, I hope things work out the way you want.  Good job on the poem!

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
4 posted 2000-12-27 04:21 PM



  This was a great poem. Not such a great way to feel, but you told your thoughts well...I wish you luck.

   ~Carly

tq_99
Junior Member
since 2000-11-14
Posts 45
Las Vegas, NM, US
5 posted 2000-12-27 04:29 PM




  This was a really good poem! I'm sorry that you are feeling this way, and I pray that you get through this situation and that everything will be ok. Great job of expressing yourself in this poem and I loved the ending. Keep up the good work. God Bless,

   - tq_99

"Some say a rich man has it all but if he has no friends he is nothing"

xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
6 posted 2000-12-28 12:28 PM


Soiunds like your love life is a lil rocky right now..i hope things straighten out for you and things start to look up...very nice poem

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
7 posted 2000-12-29 04:08 PM


Good one here......i liked it a lot. Good luck with the love life.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
8 posted 2000-12-30 03:06 PM


another example of pouring your heart out.  This is, WOW!!!  Yes, that's the word i need to describe it.  Sorry, that you have to go thru this though.  I love the poem.  keep it up and good luck

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
9 posted 2000-12-30 03:20 PM


wow, a lot of good lines here. I liked this one!

~JDR

"A writer doesn't acquire a vacancy of mind, but rather a inadequacy of words." - Jeremy D. Raulinaitis

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