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Teen Poetry #3
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Neokrew
Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 60
VA

0 posted 2000-12-24 05:53 PM


While walking through the night
A light piercing through
The darkness through my sole

My heart pounds as I am consumed
By utter fright I begin running
Running towards the light

Not knowing what lay ahead
Only hopeing I am not dead
I press on ahead

© Copyright 2000 J. T. C. - All Rights Reserved
Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
1 posted 2000-12-24 06:10 PM



  Hello and welcome to this wonderful world of poetry we call Passions!! This was really stupendous...Title, title..Must Press On? I don't know, that's a bit weak. Anyways, good luck with the light and keep posting!!

   ~Carly

WhY
ShOuLd I
Be hypnotized by someone else's lies
WhY
ShOuLd I
Take time and pride in what someone else believes...

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258
meet Morgana
2 posted 2000-12-24 06:37 PM


Welcome to Passions and specifically to this forum. This was a great start for you and I hope you'll continue to post. Title? Well I'm not sure about that. I'm not too good with titles. Sometimes it's best to just pick on really good word and go with it. Or maybe apply something else to your poem that has some relivence. Like, "The Show Must Go On". I'm just weird so you might not want to take my advice. lol Great job!  

In order to be good one must know evil.

~*Angel of Darkness*~


xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
3 posted 2000-12-24 11:44 PM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!!  

I really liked this poem...i cant wait to see more from you! Welcome again!

Neokrew
Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 60
VA
4 posted 2000-12-25 12:58 PM


Thank all of you that posted. I am so glad you liked my poem I have never written a poem much less one I would dare post so thank you for the comments that make me feel more open to posting and writting poetry and REALLY thanks to tears of glass aka jennifer because she forced me to post and write thanx jenn.

--Neo

Melster
Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442
Brisbane, Qld, Australia
5 posted 2000-12-25 01:19 AM


Great poem...  not all poems have to have a title though...  a lot do, but it isn't a law...  I can't suggest any titles for you though as I have enough trouble with my own!!

Melz!!

P.S.  I look forward to seeing more!!


Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
6 posted 2000-12-25 07:01 AM


Welcome to Passions Newkrew!

We are very happy you have decided to join our community of poetry friendship.

This was a lovely first post. I like some of the suggestions above for a title, or you might try "Toward the Light" or something along those lines. Great to have you here ... I hope to read more of your poetry and your responses to our wonderful family of poets! (check your e-mail for a special message)

Best wishes,
/Kit

Tears of Glass
Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182
Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure
7 posted 2000-12-25 08:58 PM


Hey Neokrew... Welcome to Passions!  I hope you like it here.  Way to start out your stay.  Great poem!  I told you it was good ;o)  I hope your stay here is long and enjoyable.  Keep posting, I would LOVE to hear more from you!  Welcome..

*Jennifer

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
8 posted 2000-12-26 11:47 PM


Welcome to Passions
I think this was an excellent post, I'm glad they forced you to do it   I hope to see a lot more poems out of you.  keep them coming!

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

IsGona
Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

9 posted 2000-12-26 11:52 PM


Well, Tears Of Glass is a wise, wise person.  Thank you for listening to her.  This poem was very good.  I look forward to hearing more.
IsGona

"Every body has their destiny...
I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN
~Hatebreed~

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
10 posted 2000-12-29 03:28 PM


Welcome to Passions!
I liked this a lot.........hope to see you post more!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
11 posted 2000-12-29 05:53 PM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!

Wonderful first post.  Very intruiging.  Consumes the mind and brings up dark thoughts.  At least on mine it did.  You described the events really good.  thanks for the share and keep sharing

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


DreamerGrl27
Member
since 2000-10-29
Posts 142

12 posted 2000-12-29 06:08 PM


Welcome to Passions! I hope you love it here as much as I do.  This poem was really great...you made your emotions so clear.  Keep posting!

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