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Teen Poetry #3
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Wicced_Witch
Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110
Clarksville, TN, USA

0 posted 2000-12-08 04:27 PM


Come into my sight,
My breath catches.
Bring your eyes to mine,
My heart flutters.
Touch my hand,
My skin tingles.
Pull me close,
My antisipation rises.
Caress my cheek,
My tears fall.
Pull back,
My heart shatters.
Walk away,
My breath let's go.


*thought I should explain the title...The Run-In as in a run in with an ex...

[This message has been edited by Wicced_Witch (edited 12-09-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Stephanie Elliott - All Rights Reserved
Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
1 posted 2000-12-08 05:11 PM


"My hear shatters."
I think this is a typo or I'm totally missing something here   Nice job with the poem, I really like how it's written, with an action then your reaction.  Great writing

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2000-12-08 08:14 PM


I thought this was great considering you told us what the run-in meant. That was a good move cuz i wouldn't have understood the STORY behind it. Anyway i think that's what  made the impact on me within this poem. Made me picture you running into the X...still kinda liking him and then he walks off and you're like "........" yea so great one here.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


Wicced_Witch
Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110
Clarksville, TN, USA
3 posted 2000-12-09 01:58 PM


Thanks, I am glad you liked it.  Lakewalker thanks for catching that typo for me.  I have a bad habit of not checking for them.
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