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Teen Poetry #3
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TearsOfPearls
Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 322
Vereeniging, South-Africa

0 posted 2000-12-03 02:22 PM


Take a look at me
as I am standing here,
a person with doubt,
a person with fear.

Take a look at me
as I am falling down,
slowly stumbling
over emotions pulling me down.

Take a look at me
as I am laying on the floor,
a spirit that's broken
and can't go on anymore.

Take a look at me
as God comes along,
picks me up, dusts me of
and helps me carry on.

Take a look at me
as I am standing before you,
remember that I'm a person
with mistakes just like you.

Take a look at me now...


Planning big can be a gamble...I have already rolled the dice!

© Copyright 2000 TearsOfPearls - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2000-12-03 04:28 PM


I like how it was all sad at first but then came right around with this positive vibe. Very well written poem and the transition from one vibe to the other is greatly expressed.

I'm lookin' at you now....hope to see more too!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
2 posted 2000-12-03 06:41 PM


This was such a good poem! It describes how im feeling at this time in my life perfectly...i absolutely loved this poem!! Great job!!
Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
3 posted 2000-12-04 02:59 PM


I really like how this poem I done!  The first few stanzas show your humanity and then God lets you "carry on".  For some reason I just love this, nice job

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
4 posted 2000-12-26 05:32 PM


I can't believe i missed this one. Well, now i'm glad i went back and searched for poems i havent read.  This poem is amazing...I love it.  Simply magnificent  

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


silvrduck
Member
since 2000-11-05
Posts 146

5 posted 2000-12-26 10:51 PM


Wow, great job!! I really liked this one.. it describes how i'm feeling right now.
Keep it up!  

Sarah


*The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else.*

Melster
Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442
Brisbane, Qld, Australia
6 posted 2000-12-27 05:53 PM


GREAT JOB, I love it!!

Melz!!

Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly

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