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Teen Poetry #3
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Barelybreathing
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 46


0 posted 2000-11-23 04:54 AM



Yes it's true
I don't go to church anymore
And last Sunday I was partying with my crew
Don't be so shocked
You know well enough that it's been ages since I last prayed
And that my bible is covered with a thick layer of dust
Yes I remember
That I used to be a Jesus freak
And you'd see me on the streets daily,evangelising
But now I'm quitting on God
And I don't want you to ask me why
Because I'll just say I don't know..

Yes it's true
I've failed my final exams
And I probably won't graduate
Don't be so shocked
You know well enough that I didn't bother to study
And that I usually skipped my classes
Yes I remember
That I used to be the smartest girl in school
And I had a dozen trophies attached to my name
Even a scholarship of merit waiting in line
But now I'm throwing it all away
And I don't want you to ask me why
Because I'll just say I don't know..

Yes it's true
I drink and smoke
I even do dope
Don't be so shocked
You know well enough about my late nights
And the sort of guys I hang out with
Yes I remember
That I used to say drunks and druggies were total losers
And I swore I'd never be like them
But I'll never be that self-righteous again
And I don't want you to ask me why
Because I'll just say I don't know..

Yes it's true
I tried to kill myself today
Don't be so shocked
You know well enough about my sudden mood swings
and my never-ending depression
Yes I remember
That I used to a happy, laughing girl
who lived her life and loved her life
But now I don't want to live anymore
And I don't want you to ask me why
Because I'll just say I don't know..
I don't know anything anymore.


[This message has been edited by Barelybreathing (edited 11-23-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Barelybreathing - All Rights Reserved
Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
1 posted 2000-11-23 08:56 PM


I liked the in-your-face attitude in this at the beginning.  The end scares me, you do know something, you know killing yourself is not the way to go.  So if this is about you I suggest you talk to people and try to get help.  The poem was very good in my opinion, it flowed well and had real emotion in it.  Awesome job of writing this.

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

http://www.thehungersite.com

Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

2 posted 2000-11-23 11:09 PM


Very powerful poem.  I agree with Lakewalker in saying suicide isn't the way to go.  None of that is the way to go, and you obviously know that.  I hope this really isn't about you.  If you need to talk I'm here, keep your head up and smile
Bel

kimmy
Member
since 2000-07-31
Posts 98

3 posted 2000-11-24 12:50 PM


i agree..suicide is not the answer to anything...but i really enjoyed this poem..it was powerful and full of emotions..but i hope things start to look up..(if this peom is about you)
TopGunLauren
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718
California
4 posted 2000-11-24 02:34 AM


I want to start off by saying I've read hundreds of poems on here and yours has been the best one I've read yet. When I read it sounded like it was exactly about my life and that was so cool.From suicide to drugs and alcohol I've delt with them all. Plus I used to go to church every Sunday but not as much anymore because I rather sleep in. And school is also all screwed up but I guess that's life you know what I mean. Anyway awsome poem and I hope to read more of your work!
  Lauren

DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
5 posted 2000-11-24 02:44 PM


oh wow~I'm sorry you dont know anything or so you say. But you have to know something about yourself and how you feel and what your morals are to be able to write a masterpiece like this   Keep your chin up and im here to talk to if you want, just click on my profile or whatever it's called and mail me  

-=-=-=I really like your name on here, Barelybreathing. thats what drew my attention=-=-=-

~!*DQ*!~
< !signature-->

"A true friend can see the truth and pain in your eyes, even when you're fooling everyone else"


[This message has been edited by DancinQueen (edited 11-24-2000).]

Barelybreathing
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 46

6 posted 2000-11-24 09:49 PM


Thank you all for replying. It means a lot.
~sam~

'The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own.'
~Montaigne~


Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
7 posted 2000-11-25 02:06 AM


Hey......i liked the poem.....but everything that lakewalker said has got to be followed. Good luck!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
8 posted 2000-12-09 11:29 PM


This bothered me.  Not because i don't like the poem, but cause when i see people go thru all these things, i hate it.  I feel like i'd rather take everyone's pain and have all of you be happy.  Cause to me, seeing others happy is what makes me happy.  I have one thing i'd like you to do.  Please show this to someone really close to you.  An adult preferably.  They can find help for you.  Please do so

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


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