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Teen Poetry #3
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If I Could Let Go
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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If I Could Let Go |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697
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This isn't one of my best, but I thought I would share it with you guys. Thanks for reading!  I wander through a garden Full of light and love As the radiant red sun Shines down from above It seems I’ve encountered Eden With trees and flowers galore Being in such paradise Who could ask for more? As I walk the flowered path The flowers rise to see Roses, violets, lilies alike Scream “pick me, pick me! I will change your life forever I’ll fill you with life and love Cast away your past; take me Radiant as the stars above” In spite of the beauty beckoning I cling to the flower I own It’s old, wilted, and covered with thorns But still, I can’t let go “Cast that old plant aside That’s all you have to do!” But I hold tighter and old scars Begin to bleed anew The thorns are piercing my hands The petals crunch to the ground I lower my head as the light fades And weep cause I can’t come around “Foolish, foolish!” cry the plants From the garden I go I weep still, thinking of what I could have If I could only let go "Where there is great love there are always miracles" -Cather "Love heals everything, and love is all there is"- Zukav |
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| © Copyright 2000 Erica N. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
This is lovely Erica ... wonderful description, with such tender imagery. You've set a beautifully touching mood in this piece. Very nicely done! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
OH, this IS good. I love it. Sometimes we do hang onto something familiar, afraid to try something new. And is that a bad thing? No. I don't think so. I like this!  |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Erica- I love this!! This is VERY nicely done and with such excellent imagery... I really enjoyed reading it! *smile*, -vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, you have not truely met the poet." -vlraynes |
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IsGona Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723 |
ditto to what poet deVine said. This IS an exlellent piece. thx for sharing IsGona "Every body has their destiny... I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN ~Hatebreed~ |
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layla Member
since 2000-11-19
Posts 74 |
i thought this was a wonderful poem, very well written, and i can really identify with it. Thanx so much for sharing. I'm glad i read it. |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
awesome rhyme here, i really liked it, i cant believe you thought it wasnt one of your best, welll best of luck! jeremy r "...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~ |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
A wonderful metaphor here my friend, with great imagery! Lovely work! *Krista Knutson* "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar." Helen Keller |
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Kandi Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 354North of Hell |
*~Wow...I really loved this poem, not just what it was saying but also the way you said it. It was well written. I think we all can relate to the frustration portrayed here. Great job ~~~Kristin~~~ ~*Things you see the way you see them will never be seen again*~ ~Won't you come and hold my hand? This world has taken me as far as it can... wit |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I love the first stanza of this, and the whole thing is excellent. The meaning is important and I just overall love the poem "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!! http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Coof New Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 7 |
Only three pieces of advice. Carry on talking to the plants (it’s good for them). Keep listening to your heart (it’ll seldom let you down). Keep writing poetry (because you can). Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool: But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This was yet another great one! keep em rollin!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I actually think this is one of your best ones that i've read. Thanks for the great read buggy  keep sharingI see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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