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Teen Poetry #3
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Master
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA

0 posted 2000-10-26 07:41 PM


“...and, like eggs in the frying pan, the face
spills its eyes all over the pillowcase.”
J. Brodsky

Arid thirst crams my larynx with silence,
Laughing hunger arises inside,
Like the sun through the shades, through my eyelids,
Burning rings scorch my eyes with their light.

It’s unbearably hot, -- hell is showing its preview.
Down the cheeks, sultry dreams in small beads,
Slide and rest on chapped lips, then continue,
Down the firmament, falling like seeds.

Is this hell or an aftermath of a global warming?
Both are bearable, but I think that it’s neither.
Turn it down, Goodness! I’ve got the warning!
No reply... – this must be a fever.



Check out my poetry here:


http://cafepoetry.com/stage1/andrey_kneller.htm#My%20Hamlet


© Copyright 2000 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved
Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

1 posted 2000-10-26 07:46 PM


Wow, that was great!!  I especially liked the ending.  Ya know..somehow I'm not sure I got all this the first time..I think I'll read it again.  Yes I'm a little slow this evening.    Alright, keep it up you've got talent..hasta luego
Bel

Master
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA
2 posted 2000-10-26 09:01 PM


Thanks Bel, I'm glad you liked it!

Check out my poetry here:


http://cafepoetry.com/stage1/andrey_kneller.htm#My%20Hamlet


Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
3 posted 2000-10-27 02:57 PM



  Hey. This was kickin'!! I really liked it...

The grindstone of life will either polish us or wear us down, depending on what we're made of.


Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
4 posted 2000-10-27 04:46 PM


The ended made this thing great. I think the ending is the highlight of the poem, at least in my eyes. Pretty witty to me.



"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

Master
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA
5 posted 2000-10-27 06:15 PM


Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Check out my poetry here:


http://cafepoetry.com/stage1/andrey_kneller.htm#My%20Hamlet


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
6 posted 2000-10-27 06:38 PM


This one seemed so dramatic, and I like the ending of it a lot too.  Well done

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

curlygurly
Member
since 2000-09-12
Posts 276
USA
7 posted 2000-10-27 06:40 PM


wow this was really good! and i actually surprised myself when i understood it! great poem!
Curlz


"I feel fine enough I guess
considering everything's a mess"
Barenaked Ladies



Master
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA
8 posted 2000-10-27 08:05 PM


Thanks guys!
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