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Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

0 posted 2000-10-16 01:49 PM

Broken Strings:

And still the clouds are gray
With shades of black and smiles of death.
Wisking away into the silhouette
Of shadow lights, and crying children.

Loosing self in a man made soul
With frozen tears and rotting fears,
And khaki heart with blue trim
Pumping away into the horizon.

And still the lonely dawn glistens
Within its blackhole void of
Unrequited dreams with shattered goals.
This stand still lust for love in decay.

Living with electric souce in all senses.
Mind consumed by the loss of all it's worth.
The withering trees of a power struck life
Tear me apart from my 13th string that gave me happiness.

"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

Child of the Stars

Senior Member

since 2000-09-07

Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

1 posted 2000-10-16 03:14 PM

Holy smokes Javi. Why the heck am I the first to reply to this?? It was incredbile!! The wording was perfect, the ideas were perfectly stated....whoa...

~Carly

"I see," said the blind man to his deaf wife reading the newspaper.

Lakewalker
Member Elite

since 2000-08-05

Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people

2 posted 2000-10-16 03:24 PM

Hey Dopey- I hate your socks too

...sorry...oh yeah, the poem, nice work!

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Pixie-Babe03
Member

since 2000-08-29

Posts 387
Central Maine

3 posted 2000-10-16 03:58 PM

Javier*~
this is soo great

"and khaki hear with blue trim" hreat discription

~*Justine*~

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

4 posted 2000-10-16 06:45 PM

Its really good. I liked the way u use your words, beautiful.....It reminds me of someone I know. Bravo...congratulation of a poem well done...How can someone who writes so freely judge someone so harshly?.....
Regina
~Ina~

"There is no money,there is no possesions, only obbessions, take my money, take my money..I dont need that S***T.."
~Papa Roach Between insects and a

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