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Teen Poetry #3
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hoppy
Member
since 2000-01-27
Posts 271


0 posted 2000-10-06 11:41 PM


Here's a not so little poem i wrote a few minutes ago.  Just one of those that flowed word for word from my head to my fingers.  There have been no edits so do'nt worry about wording and grammar.  Just read what i have to say, i think many can relate somewhat.  I give you.......

I hate that i wasted so much on you
when there's so many more who care
about me and how i feel and each
day they ask me how it's been and
i know they care from the tone in
their voice as they speak of days
gone by and times past through
like the ones we went through
that you no longer remember or
care to share in reflection instead
hide them inside and act like i
never was a part of your life and
your dreams you lived with every
day and night you try to forget
everything you know just as I
couldn't wash you from my thoughts
with the self righteous acts and
insanity i let prevail in my life
as a deterant from the inevitable
realization that you cared not
for me nor my life but your own
selfish reguard and infamous
carelessness  you display to
your family and friends when
we see you lie to everyone
including yourself does not
know what you are doing behind
that clouded sick head that
you have developed a blind
sickness and refuse to see
reality which makes you less
of a person and a horrible
display for your children to
come in the future you will
still disreguard truth as an
asset and will stumble over
and over again because you
refuse to open your ever
blind eyes to the truth
will set you free if you let
go and allow Him to work
in you and quit refusing
help and shut your mouth
and open your mind to see
that you have errored and
have become as the thing I
hate that you have become
what you are the appitomy
of all that is dispised
and all that is good to
be with as the fire went
out and i saw the deadness
set in when i knew that you
had fallen and would not
let another pick you up
from the thorns you are in
and i will not reach my
hand to help you up from
there, not now and not
in the days to come
when all has passed
away and you again speek
of how it was back then
I will stare at you in
disreguard to your words
and care not what you say
nor will i ever again
tolerate your lies so
i refuse you thus i
refuse to put from me
the best i am!


There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
-- Oscar Levant

"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

© Copyright 2000 Hoppy - All Rights Reserved
Darque Poet
New Member
since 2000-10-07
Posts 5

1 posted 2000-10-07 10:51 AM


Excellent poem. Haven't seen you in a while. Come join us @ Poetry in the System! E-mail me for details.

Thomas

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
2 posted 2000-10-07 12:13 PM


Wow, poured right of your head!  This is good, yes, long, but good.  Very well done hoppy!!
hoppy
Member
since 2000-01-27
Posts 271

3 posted 2000-10-07 05:57 PM


Glad to see so many people enjoyed this one!

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
-- Oscar Levant

"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
4 posted 2000-10-07 07:32 PM


I can't wait to see what you could write when you take your time.  this is really good  

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


hoppy
Member
since 2000-01-27
Posts 271

5 posted 2000-10-07 11:36 PM


take my time *L*  it might help but 99.9% of the things i write come strait from my head to my fingers and i never edit it.  I think it takes away from the quality of a writing if it's revised too much.  Though, never know

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
-- Oscar Levant

"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

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