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HerMelness
Junior Member
since 2000-07-12
Posts 37
Bridgewater, NS, Canada

0 posted 2000-10-01 11:31 AM



I can see it in your eyes, in the way they darken as your trembling lips speak her name.

I can feel it in your touch, the way your hand stiffens in mine as she walks into the room.

You try SO hard to erase her from your memory. Considering it painful to endure thoughts from the past.

Yet it's so obvious to me, although you fail to see, that your attempts are in vain, because erasing her from your mind will still leave her where she really is.. in your heart.

Which leaves me.. where?


-Wherever you go, go with all your heart.-

© Copyright 2000 Melanie - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2000-10-01 12:52 PM


I liked this a lot. Especially the ending. It fits it so perfectly and i think it's great. This is the first time i see you post up anything so HELLO from me and keep posting



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.


Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
2 posted 2000-10-01 01:39 PM


This line is my favorite: because erasing her from your mind will still leave her where she really is.. in your heart.

That was a really good idea to put in the poem...Because even if you try to forget about someone they will still be in your heart if you really love them...Good work!!! Thanks for sharing...

P.S.~What made you call it soul mates??


It TaKeS a MiNuTe To LiKe SoMeOnE, aN hOuR tO hAvE a CrUsH oN sOmEoNe & A dAy To FaLl In LoVe, BuT iT tAkEs A lIfEtImE tO fOrGeT sOmEoNe.

anomaly187
Member
since 2000-06-15
Posts 284
San Francisco,CA,US
3 posted 2000-10-01 02:02 PM


hey man loved the poem..it flowed nicely and you expressed yourself nicely..

HUT TWO THREE FOUR!
HUT TWO THREE FOUR!
the clowns on parade
the clowns mascerade
rip off your face
rip off your brain
the clowns on parade
-me

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
4 posted 2000-10-01 02:36 PM


This is written well, I liked reading it.  I really like the ending too, it raps up the meaning of the poem well.  Keep posting !
Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
5 posted 2000-10-01 02:41 PM



  Hey this was really good. I too liked the ending a lot. Very nice job.

   ~Carly

Better days are on the way, my friend, just a ways on down the line.
I believe that just around the bend, everythings gonna be fine...

HerMelness
Junior Member
since 2000-07-12
Posts 37
Bridgewater, NS, Canada
6 posted 2000-10-01 04:11 PM


Thanks for all the comments.

I took a break from my poetry writing, which is why I haven't been posting lately. I'll be sure to come by more often.
I named it soulmates, because.. my boyfriend seems to think we're perfect for one another. But something, THIS thing, is standing in the way. Hence the question mark. =) Thanks again! Hope to see some of your stuff soon!


-Wherever you go, go with all your heart.-

Jenn Cirrincione
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
7 posted 2000-10-01 05:43 PM


I liked this one a lot. I hope he realizes what it is that he wants exactly. Good luck.
Jenn


"He's mastered the art, of looking sincere, his eyes have a way, of making you stay, don't look in the mirror"- Chely Wright

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