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Teen Poetry #3
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hoppy
Member
since 2000-01-27
Posts 271


0 posted 2000-09-08 11:58 PM


This is about a loss that i've encountered recently.  Hard times but i think this poem came out decent.

Even though we've changed
I still remember back then
before the trial and rage.
And i look back when
I think of your love
The way i remember it then,
As from the heart of a dove
Is how it should have been.
Dealing with your heart
from truth spilled as lies
strait from the heart
my word falls and dies.
How do you believe it
when the world falls apart
and by his hand the fire is lit
taking you from the start.
Hanging on my every word
I see it in your eyes
you think it's so obserd
that he could lie by your side.
Untruth from his lips
You refuse to egknowledge
Despite blatant facts and tips
You stagger near the edge.
Unsure, distrot, and full of fear
Please don't jump,
I love you still.


There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
-- Oscar Levant

"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

© Copyright 2000 Hoppy - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2000-09-09 12:00 PM


Sorry for the loss bud. Nice poem tho. Keep posting. but once again....sorry for the loss.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.


hoppy
Member
since 2000-01-27
Posts 271

2 posted 2000-09-09 02:22 PM


thanks for the one comment,  glad to see someone read it

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
-- Oscar Levant

"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

anomaly187
Member
since 2000-06-15
Posts 284
San Francisco,CA,US
3 posted 2000-09-09 02:35 PM


hey yeah sorry for the loss.i hope you can get through it..this poem really is emotional.keep yourself together.

Now night arrives with her purple legions
Retire now to your tents & to your dreams
Tomorrow we enter the town of my birth
I want to be ready. - JM

Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
4 posted 2000-09-09 04:35 PM



I really loved this...I really don't know what else to say except the fact that I'm sorry about your loss...
I used to be here at passions, a long time ago, and I remember your poems. I just want you to know that every single one spoke to my heart.

  ~carly
< !signature-->

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.

[This message has been edited by Child of the Stars (edited 09-09-2000).]

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