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Teen Poetry #3
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Open Hearts
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Open Hearts |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ 
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*Im not sure if I am gonna keep this as the title. But if anyone could help me out with one it would be perfect. Thanks! Enjoy! If I know what love is, its all because of you. You took my heart, as I found a love that is true. God sent you to me, from the heaven's above. To come to me, and share you love. But you came to me, with an open heart. Looking for a brighter day, looking for the perfect start. While I came to you, just looking for a friend. And now I have, a lot more then that in the end. ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ |
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| © Copyright 2000 Erin Erbs - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jenabou Member
since 2000-06-13
Posts 215Oklahoma/Nova Scotia Canada/USA |
this was very good!!! about the title maybe "A God Sent" or "more in the end" i dunno!!!?!?!? hahaah great work Love Ya Bunches ~Jen~ The world is like a mirror; frown at it, and it frowns at you. Smile and it smiles, too Be kind,for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle |
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Jacman Member
since 2000-06-27
Posts 291Dwight Il, US |
woooooooopie, (that is pronounced wooooooo pie) Pardon the retarded sillyness but I'm posting first to your poem and I felt like being somewhat of a drama queen myself. Although that is physically impossible just nevermind that fact and go with it.  Anywhoo, this is a great poem and the title works for me so I think that you should keep it. You both kind of came into it with open hearts so there you go, it fits. jason  Just as soon as I belong, then it's time I disapear... -Metallica- |
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Jacman Member
since 2000-06-27
Posts 291Dwight Il, US |
Well Erin, it seems as though someone types faster than me so now I look stupid. Oh, well I tried.  Just as soon as I belong, then it's time I disapear... -Metallica- |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Jen~~~Thanks for the reply!!!I really appreciate it...Im glad you liked my poem too!!! Jason~~~Well you could be SDQ for silly drama queen...Cuz you know Jessica is CDQ for crazy drama queen...And I am DQ for just plain old drama queen...About the title I never thought about that...But thanks for pointing that out for me!!!Someone did that to me when I replied to Jeremy poem so I had to go back and fix it...LOL< !signature--> ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ [This message has been edited by ERIN (edited 09-05-2000).] |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
another beautiful poem by my fellow illinoian/chicagoan!!! Sweet writing i think jenabou gave the best titles besides what you already have p.s. hey, i left an answer to the question you had to one of my poems As i wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Acire~~~Well what can I say???Thanks for the reply...I really appreciate it...By the way what poem did I leave a question on??? ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ |
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Pixie-Babe03 Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387Central Maine |
Erin*~ once again, great work i love it!!!~*Pixie*~ |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
Very good poem! The title works... if you really want to change it maybe..."unexpected love" or something along those lines. Good work! Jenn |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well it was nice. I liked the subject. Good job. BUUUUUUUUUTTTTTT i think the title is fine.....i would never take suggestions on titles from anybody...even if they were my best friend or lover. NEVER EVER....you took the time of writing the poem.....so i say.....keep the title or come up with one yourself. This is SOOOOOOOOOO not hostile, hope it doesnt come out in that tone. Im speaking from a writer to a writer....keep YOUR own thoughts and creativity within your work. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
What is there for me to say that hasn't already been said?!?! You're so talented my dear DQ! I loved, absolutely loved this poem! You're wonderful!! I really don't know what else to say, so you keep writing, and I'll keep replying...and we'll go from there. hehe. Love ya bunches. Love Always ~*~Jess Girl~*~CDQ~*~ ~*~ :) If aLl My FrIeNdS JuMpEd OfF a BrIdGe, I WoUlDn'T JuMp WiTH ThEm BeCaUsE I'd Be At ThE bOtToM tO CaTcH ThEm. :) ~*~ |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
Awesome Erin....loved it! I like the title as it is truely. This was very nicely penned, keep em coming! Salma |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Wow I didnt think I would have this many replies when I got on!!!Thanks all of you's very much!!! ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ |
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Jeremy Halstead Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569Morris, Ill. U.S.A |
naninanibooboo, Jason wear's pink tootoo's....uh...sorry...anywhoo, this was really sweet....keep it flowin m'dear Jeremy "Time is the matter, and in a matter of that all wounds will heal and all scars shall fade." |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Jeremy~~~Does he really???Or do you and you are just saying Jason does???LOL Thanks for the reply buddy!!!  YoU cAn CoMpLaIn CuZ rOsEs HaVe ThOrNs Or ReJoIcE cUz ThOrNs HaVe RoSeS |
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