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Teen Poetry #3
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Lani_DarkOne
Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 152
UK

0 posted 2000-08-20 02:08 PM


** haven't visited here for a while, ello everyone  . my first vain attempt of rhyming..here goes..

Gloomy street, wet with tears
Cars charge past, owners blind to genuinely slow
Human fears.

Pools of trembling lamplight
Illuminates lethargic pedestrians
Cast tentative, glowing insight
Through dense, machine-infested, twisted
Polluted night air.

Gloomy street, wet with tears,
People avert eyes from others,
Afraid to reveal...inwardly shudders
Fear for their personal safety.

Sun makes her appearance
Light struggles through the smog
Fingers bleed, cut by  factories wrathful transmittance
Sun snatches back her hand,
Squints accusingly at the shrouding fog.

Gloomy street, wet with tears
Wrinkles etch deep into humanity
Blind to the indifference of our blazing Sun
Oblivious to screams of dying nature
Only can peer through
Trembling lamplight.




"Controlling my feelings for too long....
And forcing our darkest souls to unfold...
And pushing us into self-destruction...."
*~Muse*~

© Copyright 2000 Lani_DarkOne - All Rights Reserved
DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
1 posted 2000-08-21 12:04 PM


This wasn't vain at all!! it was really good. keep up the great work!  

~!*DQ*!~


"One fine day you'll look at me and know that love was meant to be"
~Carol King

Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
2 posted 2000-08-21 02:27 AM


this is really good...i think you should try rhyming more often...looks good to me!!!

~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~


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