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Teen Poetry #3
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Jose Marti
Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374
washing DC

0 posted 2000-08-19 12:48 PM


I wrote this in spanish
I am working on a translation,
It should be done by tomorow.
try to see my dilema: translating poetry is difficult!


~ Chevere
~ que chevere
~ que chevere

Suena la tumbadora
sentado entre mis manos.

llegaban los rumberos
de todas partes lejanas
para bilar su ritmo,
saltaban y gozaban.

ya no saltan
ya no gozan
yo no vienen de todas partes.
se partio el cuero,
y dejø de sonar la tumbadora.

© Copyright 2000 Jose Marti - All Rights Reserved
Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
1 posted 2000-08-19 04:04 PM


i bet this poem is good...i cant wait till you translate it!!!too bad i didnt pay attention in Spanish class last year then i wouldnt have to wait for the translation...

~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
2 posted 2000-08-19 05:00 PM


I have no clue what this says, so I'll be waiting for the translation too
Jose Marti
Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374
washing DC
3 posted 2000-08-23 01:04 PM


~slick
~real slick
~real slick

sounds the conga drum
seated here
between my hands

dancers would come
from all over
to move with it's rythm.


no longer do they move with it's rythm
no longer do they come from all over,
the skin broke
and the conga sounds no more.

Salooma
Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781

4 posted 2000-08-24 01:08 AM


i can kinda understand this....from your translation that is...but i know how hard translation is....i've tried! it has such beautiful meaning in your language, but in translation you can't give it the same meaning....they are just words that don't give you the same feeling....

great post...
salooma

JnR4eva
Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377
Bronx, NY
5 posted 2000-08-24 02:06 AM


im gonna have to go with salooma on this one...i am puerto rican and though i know very little spanish, i was reading it in tongue and the words were very romanitc as i read them....then i read the englih version and boom...it has done no justice to the original..truly inspirational...makes me wanna write a poem in spanish now LOL  


"my love is my motivation
my love is my inspiration
perception of this poem
is your interpretation"
-- me



Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
6 posted 2000-08-24 02:48 PM


well jose i finally got to read what this poem was about...and i like it...but it seems like it would sound better in spanish...but i like it!!!keep up the good work!!!

~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~


Jose Marti
Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374
washing DC
7 posted 2000-08-25 12:32 PM


thanks everybody for reading.
As I'm sure you all seem to agree, it was better in spanish. (lots of onomatopea)

JenR4eva ~ believe it or not, although spanish is my first language, there was a time when I spoke almost none of it. I have made lots of concious effort since then, visited Cuba, and lived in Miami. If you miss your spanish, all you have to do is want it back bad enough. If you feel a need to write poetry in spanish by all means do! It's a good way to begin to regain your spanish. Even if you don't want to post it, e-mail it to me. I'll read it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Although my Spanish fluency is very good, (enough to understand even the strangest accents, or even occasionally to hang out at foreign embassies.), I struggle with writing spanish poetry. My spanish poetic vocabulary, is at about the same level as in english, but spanish poetry itself has reached such a level that it dwarfs english peotry. What I write in spanish is laughable, even when compaired to the most ameture of ametures.

I sum this up by saying: In Spanish, I'm the poetic equivilant of a little punk on the corner.

Jose Marti
Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374
washing DC
8 posted 2000-08-28 12:30 PM


since nobody read the last thing I posted on to here, let me just say that perhaps I was just a little too rash. Spanish is a very beautiful language. eEven a reasonable attempt at poetry usaully reaps rewards. In spanish, the language is beautiful enough that the just sort of writes itself. (not the case in english)
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
9 posted 2000-08-28 07:10 AM


I applaud you Jose! It must be so difficult translating back and forth, trying to get the same feel and meaning across. Though I cannot understand the Spanish version, the words fascinated me ... it's a beautiful sounding language! Thanks for translating, and keep up the great writing!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

10 posted 2000-08-28 07:04 PM


Muy bien Jose!  Hey what else can I say?  Keep it up
Bel

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