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Teen Poetry #3
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TearsOfPearls
Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 322
Vereeniging, South-Africa

0 posted 2000-08-04 05:57 PM


Ok...First things first, the first part of this poem, was given to me by Jessica's (my friend who was killed) best friend, and she said that it was unfinished and that I could finish it if I wanted to, as you can see, I did, though I am not sure if it was the right thing to do...any way...here it is...tell me what you think, and don't be scared to be honest. First part by Jessica, second part by me...


Will these thoughts of mine
gain forever or another day?
Do I want them to go
or do I want them to stay?
Then I wish my thoughts could stay,
the wonderful thoughts
of my dreams and fairytale wishes
that may become so true
as my love for you.

Will these thoughts of mine
gain forever or another day?
Will they stay with me together
or will they find a way to stray?
Now I know thoughts don't last,
they get changed and rearranged
like the colors of the sky that
strange enough will die and never be true
unlike my love for you.

© Copyright 2000 TearsOfPearls - All Rights Reserved
TopGunLauren
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718
California
1 posted 2000-08-04 06:17 PM


That poem was awsome and I think you did the right thing by finishing it.
  Lauren

Kittie
Member
since 2000-07-08
Posts 103

2 posted 2000-08-04 07:12 PM


Great job finishing the poem, it's very beautiful.  
Kittie



Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
3 posted 2000-08-05 03:26 PM


tears~~~good poem...you did a good job finishing it...and just like topgunlauren said you did the right thing by finishing it for her...

~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~

TAP2
Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 211
Morris, Il USA
4 posted 2000-08-05 04:08 PM


As alwayz, loved it once again. You did a wonderful job finishing up, couldn't tell where the transition from one poet to the other was made. Impressive.

Thomas A. Plemmons

"I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss The Dance"

-Garth Brooks-

TearsOfPearls
Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 322
Vereeniging, South-Africa
5 posted 2000-08-05 05:31 PM


Thanks you guys, thanks a lot, I really, really appraciate it.  

I really didn't feel like I did the right thing, but you changed my mind. Thanks again Lauren, Kittie, Erin and Thomas.

God bless.



Waves...amazing hey? Wind blowing over smoothe ocean water creates shear. The longer the wind blows, and the futher the fetch, the more energy gets transferred from the wind to the water. What started off as a breeze 1 000km away, ends up as a glass-faced barrel at some far off beach.

Salooma
Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781

6 posted 2000-08-05 10:38 PM


Wow....that was beautiful. I don't know if it was the thought of the death of your friend and this poem or if it was the actual beauty of the words that lured me in...cause either way that's one of a kind. Great job...I guess what I would do is leave it by her grave cause I think maybe if there is some other world out there that she'll be glad you finished it. Do you mind if i ask what happened to your friend. I probably was gone at the time.

Salooma

SweetPoet17
Member
since 2000-08-04
Posts 108

7 posted 2000-08-05 10:53 PM


I wish I knew the definition of death, I mean what can anyone say, a life ends and affects so many, I cry, I scream, and there are no answers we must thank the lord for every breathe... for that last breathe could be any moment...
-Jessica-

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