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Teen Poetry #3
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They Say I Got Lucky
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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They Say I Got Lucky |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
A selfish hand holing an unforgiving knife Cutting, so eagerly awaiting and end to all this strife The bittersweet pain stung my tearfilled eyes As I quickly scribbled my last good-byes Burning tears flowed so easily to the floor It didn't really hurt, my heart just let out a silent roar Crimson drops now fell to a scary red pool I remember it like yesterday, the air outside was so cool This was it, I was starting to feel faint The carpet now satuarated in this ugly red paint The next thing I remember-waking up in a hospital bed I guess I got lucky--at least that's what the doctors said Mom's eyes and ocean full of pain and tears They were all coming true; a parent's worst fears I'm sorry mom, I dodn't m,ean to make you cry I just truly deep inside really wanted to die It was nothing you did, you were the perfect mom Inside my heart was a ticking time bomb Daddy hurt me very much when he left, you see And with out my little family by my side I just wasn't me The pain inside was way too intense How could he just give me up?!!? It didnt make sense I'm still your little girl mommy, and I always will be I guess they were right mom, I did get lucky! ~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~ ~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~ |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jessica Lynn - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Jess- Hey, well in talking to you, I've realized what a great person you are. You did get lucky, and so did all of your friends and family. Keep up your writing-great poem. Bel |
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Chel Senior Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 511Baltimore, MD, USA |
Hey there Girlie You did get Lucky, and so did everyone else that you live with. I am sorry about your dad. Talk to you soon, and stay strong. Luv always, Chel "True friends stab you in the front" |
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Jeremy Halstead Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569Morris, Ill. U.S.A |
Jess, we're all the lucky ones. That's probably the most well writen poem I've read of yours. I hope that occurences like that never happen again with you. There are too many of us poeple who love you. Jeremy "Time is the matter, and in a matter of that all wounds will heal and all scars shall fade." |
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Jeremiah Johnson Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223Brooksville, Fl, U.S |
very well said i loved it much do keep it up as always your friend Jeremiah. I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson- |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
this is the best poem yet that i have read of yours...i probably say that to alot of them...but i truly mean it...you write so beautifully...im really sorry that you had to go through this type of pain...ive been there at a point in my life...but was to scared to do it...so i sliced my legs instead...now i have 5 ugly scars to remember what i did...girl if you ever want to talk you know i am here and will listen...my email is bashful2896@aol.com...how does your dad feel about this??? did you talk to him about it???honestly dont kill yourself over that...think of how everyone else will feel if you actually do succeed...think of all the pain you will bring on everyone if you did do it...there are people out there that do care...smile cuz god loves you and so does everyone else that got a chance to know you...even if it was just by reading your poetry...i know ive learned alot from it...stay strong...if this happened because of your father...dont let him bring you down...you got your whole life ahead of you... ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
I'm so glad that you "got lucky" as you say. I'm also glad that you see what a mistake this was, and I hope you'll never try anything like this again. Life is a precious gift, even during the toughest times. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING is worth taking your life over. I say this to you, Jessica, and to anyone who reads this. There is ALWAYS someone who cares about you. Your parents care. Your friends care. Your teachers care. Your church community cares. I care. Everyone here cares. If anyone ever feels that they want to harm themselves, or if you know someone who feels this way, TELL SOMEONE. Get help. Today may be dark, tomarrow may seem the same, but there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Never give up. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde "The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief" -Shakespea |
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Lucius Cade Member
since 2000-03-23
Posts 235Saskatchewan |
Well jessica this was a life changing experience for you, and I would like to say you expressed it beautifuly. p Lucidity is the answer to all problems |
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Jacman Member
since 2000-06-27
Posts 291Dwight Il, US |
Jessica, this is a truly well orchestrated piece of work. I must say, that in my experiences thus far with life and death that I don't believe in luck. But I do believe in fate, and a higher power above guiding us in our everyday existances. I no longer believe, as a have in the past, that we have the power to take our own life in our hands. Remember this, because this is what got me through. I am alive for a purpose, and I serve an almighty King, (God himself), and he created me and allows me to live. If I had never come to that realization I would have been dead long ago. Well, I can't believe I just said all of that, I just feel it is my duty to help people that have dealt with the same things as I. Sorry to have taken so much of your reading time, you can write as much as you want to me. I am a good reader. jason |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Oh Jessica ... you write straight from the heart you do ... just a heart-wrenching read. If I'm understanding the responses, this was based on what really happened? Please, please understand that as LoveBug says, there are always people that care and can understand and help in these difficult times. I was so pleased to see your positive uplifting closing which tied with your title. You are indeed a "lucky girl". Try to remain focussed on tomorrow, as there are always brighter days ahead, and keep writing ... it's the best way to keep ahead, you have some great talent here StarPryncess ... very well written! Best wishes, /Kit [This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 07-03-2000).] |
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TAP2 Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 211Morris, Il USA |
Believe me, you are a very lucky girl. When dark clouds rise, the ones that love you most will be there to help you through the storm. Don't ever sell yourself short. The meaning of life is to live it to it's fullest, and to reach the potential within all of us. Keep it up! TAP2 |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
Oh you guys are sooo sweet! Your support has definately made me feel better about living this little life of mine!  Bel~oh thanks girl! You make me feel so special! Chel~I just hope they fell that way too. hehe. thxs hun! And just for you, i'll try to stay strong! Jeremy~well, thanks my dear, I'm glad you liked the poem! I can tell you that nothing will ever happen like that again!! and yes I love ya too! Jeremiah~I'm glad you liked it!! hey did you get my e-mail?!?! Erin~I'm glad you liked it, hell, I'm glad you like all my poems.I'm sorry you have the scars on your legs!! At least it's not obvious how you were feeling! I, unfortunately have a big deep scar on my wrist and always fear that people will see it and I fear what they will think of me knowing I did that! Thank you soo much for the words of support my friend. Keep your head up and I'll do my best to do the same ok? LoveBug~well, I learned that after the fact. But I'm so happy that I did get lucky! I realized that no one not even my own flesh and blood is worth killing myself over. I would give my life for people very dear to my heart but never again will I try to take my life because of some asshole who can't acknowledge the fact that I am his creation and his just leaves. anywho, I am very happy that I did get "lucky" because had I not, I wouldn't have the things that I do now. I have learned to take things for what they are not what I want them to be. and I heard something that truly made me feel different. and that is: "Fear not, if nothing seems well worth living for, it very well can't be worth dyong for either!" Wish I woulda considered that before I did what I did. oh and your reply truly made me cry, no worries though, it was good!! hehehe, thanks for the kind words!! Lucius~yes it was life changing! I've learned a lot!! I'm glad you liked the poem!thanks for the reply! Jason~well, you're right, I don't truly believe in luck, but what else do I call it? I almost died and had my mom not found me I wouldn't be here right now. I would call it fate just like you do, but I'm not sure I TRULY believe in it. I believe that it only takes you so far and you do the rest. Your points are excellent and I'm sure you're right as you are a truly intelligent person. and don't worry about your reply, I like long replies! It gives me something to do and a lot more insight to your personality. Thanks for the kind words my friend!! Kit~yes, unfortunately this is something that really did happen. Not something that I'm proud of at all, but something I can't go back and undo. and to tell you the truth I don't know if I would take it back if I had the chance, It has taught me a lot. Especailly that precious value of life!! Thanks for the words of wisdom!! I feel a lot better now! Thomas~the sad thing is that they weren't. I felt this way and told some people about it and just turned their backs. I talked to my mom, she just said, Jess, your dad isn't worth it get over it. Well, it wasnt that easy I felt unloved and unwanted. so I suppose you're right, but in my situation that wasn't the case. Thank you for the kind words though, they truly do mean a lot! Thank you all for your kinds words and support! I don't know what I would do with out all of your opinions. In the short month that I have been here, I've made friends and acquaintances, I am truly thankful for that! Thank You passions for such a wonderful site!!! ~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~ ~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~ |
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Snickers Member
since 2000-05-25
Posts 88East Haddam, CT |
Jessica, Your work iz beautiful, although the situation certainly isn't. I'm so, so sorry that you felt so much pain that you thought killing yourself was the only way out. Indeed, I have felt this way many times and have tried more than once in ending it as you tried. You aren't the only "lucky" one. I've learned that life has no promises, and you can't expect things to be good at all times or even at all. And alot of times there isn't even anything you can do to improve lives circumstances. But I've also learned that if you just hang in there things will always get better. I could go on telling you my philosophy on life, but I don't think that's neccesary bc u sound like you've learned quite a bit from this experience. If ever again you feel like giving up, please please please talk to someone. Mabybe counseling would help you?? I know how much pain life can cause, but I've also come to known the happiness. If you ever want to talk, please E-mail me at Snickers_2000@webtv.net I think I can relate a lot to your situation. ~<3 Alwayz~ **Nikki** ~*~*~*~*"We can complain because roses have thorns, or we can rejoice because thorns have roses." *~*~*~*~ |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
Nikki~thank you so much for understanding. And you're right I have learned a lot from this situation! I've definately gotten stronger, it's like I said before, I regret it yes, but if I could go back and take this painful (not physically painful) scar away, I wouldn't because it has given me a chance to learn somehting I wouldn't have learned otherwise.Thank you soo much for your concern and your words of wisdom! They are truly dear to my heart!! Love Always~*~JeSsiCa~*~~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~ ~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~ |
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Jose Marti Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374washing DC |
I'm so glad that you got lucky, and could then share your feelings. The poem is beautiful. I had a friend who was not so lucky. It was a hard blow for me and all of his other friends. He never apreciated what the world had for him I guess, at the funeral, there were over 600 of us, all his friends, family, and people who cared. |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
Jose~thank you so much for the reply. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend! Guess he just didn't see all the people who cared until it was too late. I'm very sorry and hope to hear that your heart is slowly healing. Keep your heard up my friend, sounds like you've had a lot to deal with! My heart is with you. Love Always~*~Jessica~*~ ~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~ ~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~ |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
One thing that has stopped me from doing something as drastic as this is the thought of the people I'd leave behind. I think that it is very selfish of the person to do such a thing without even considering the people they leave behind. I had an ex that committed suicide 4 days after we actually told each other that there is no future between the two of us. This tore me inside, not only because she's gone, but also because I blamed myself for it. I even had the notion that she might do it and I never did anything to stop it. Finally, she did it. It took me a long time to get thru something like that. Being Catholic, I even talked to a priest about it for it ate thru me piece by piece. This is when I realized that if she was trying to get back at me she really did a good job. And if not and she did it for herself, well guess what, it still bothers the people you leave behind. So, everytime the thought comes up, just think of your love ones and how they would feel living in a world without you. Are you willing to make them go thru that pain? Use this as your strength for it works for me. Hope you've learned your lesson and that you won't try sych a thing again. I'm personally glad that you as you said "got lucky" cause I'm able to feed thru your beautiful poems. Thanks so much [This message has been edited by acire (edited 07-04-2000).] |
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Misty Member
since 1999-08-01
Posts 121USA |
Wow, what a powerful poem. I felt like I was there. Actually I was there once. It's not worth all the pain you cause your friends and family. Please be strong, and if you ever need someone to talk to......I'll be here, just e-mail me! Keep posting! ©Misty For more Poems bye Misty GO TO: http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Arc/1644 "You died a failure because you never tried!" |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
You've touched a lot of people and emotions with this verse Jessica. I don't often reply twice to a post, but everyone's been so incredibly wonderful and supportive, I wanted to add another note. I hope this will be inspiration for others who have felt badly, that always, there is light at the end of a sometimes difficult rainbow ... life IS worth the effort always, and you my dear were so "lucky". You have a wonderful gift Jessica ... and please keep up the writing ... I'm sooooooo very glad "you were lucky" (for we are too) ... Best wishes, /Kit |
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skachik New Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 5Houston area, TX, USA |
That was a beautiful piece of work with a sad meaning. Always remember that killing yourself is never the answer. God loves you..just let him take your problems off your shoulders. ~*~Mandi~*~ |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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