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Teen Poetry #3
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Jeremy Halstead
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569
Morris, Ill. U.S.A

0 posted 2000-07-01 03:27 AM



Open Up Your Eyes

Every moment without the one
that makes your heart erupt
makes you want to close your eyes
because you can see him when they're shut.
In the blackness, there he is
like the clearest summer sky.
But everytime, he dissapears
when you open up your eyes.
Sad it is, but never fear
help is on the way.
I'll do my best to help you through
each and everyday.
So when your crying on your knees
and you just can't see the sky;
you need a friend who sees the way...
just open up your eyes.

Jeremy D. Halstead
11/99

© Copyright 2000 Jeremy D. Halstead - All Rights Reserved
Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
1 posted 2000-07-01 03:35 AM


well you keep racking up my votes your a great writer in many ways and i hope that you use the idea in this poem many times with your friends. keep them coming man love to read more.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


sorrowfulangel
Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 59
Memphis,TN
2 posted 2000-07-01 04:23 AM


i think it was very well written,someone can only wish to have someone there for them like that
Chel
Senior Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 511
Baltimore, MD, USA
3 posted 2000-07-01 11:05 AM


This poem was very well written and I hope that you become a writer one day.  I want to read some more of your poems.  You won my vote.  

Chel

StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932
Colorado
4 posted 2000-07-01 06:57 PM


Jeremy~well, you always have a little way of stopping my heart with each and every word you write (or in this case type) you always seem to know just what to say to capture my heart!! Just keep it up ok? Love Always~*~Pryncess Jess~*~

~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~
~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~

LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697

5 posted 2000-07-02 12:09 PM


This is a beautiful poem. It's wonderful to have friends that are willing to show you the way...

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde
"The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief" -Shakespea

TAP2
Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 211
Morris, Il USA
6 posted 2000-07-02 12:13 PM


Jer,
As alwayz, love it!
I may be able to sing, but I stand in your shadow when it comes to poetry. Keep it up!
TAP2

Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
7 posted 2000-07-02 03:07 PM


well what can i say about this??? it is BEAUTIFUL...we all have that friend that will be your friend for a lifetime...and i think that i have finally figured out who my angel was...actually there are 2...but god gave them to me for a reason and hopefully i will figure out why they are there for me...i really do hope that this poem makes it in the book...you have my vote!!!

~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~

Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
8 posted 2000-07-02 03:08 PM


oops sorry i accidently made a mistake by pressing the button twice!!!font>< !signature-->

~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~


[This message has been edited by ERIN (edited 07-02-2000).]

Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
9 posted 2000-10-28 02:07 PM



  Hey there, I was just looking through some old stuff and found this...I loved every part of it...so new people better read this...cuz it's amazing...

The grindstone of life will either polish us or wear us down, depending on what we're made of.


DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
10 posted 2000-10-28 02:29 PM


hey   This was great...i just love the title lol dont get me wrong the poem's awesome! but the title really is what drew my attention. well done :0

~!*Kiley
< !signature-->

"One fine day you'll look at me and know that love was meant to be"
~Carol King


[This message has been edited by DancinQueen (edited 10-28-2000).]

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
11 posted 2000-10-28 09:03 PM


I think this one is really well done.  It expresses such a clear idea, I like it

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
12 posted 2000-10-28 11:44 PM


This was a very sweet poem. I liked it a lot.



"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

peanogrl83
Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 202

13 posted 2000-10-29 12:22 PM


This was well written. Nice flow, nice style, nice  message. Great job!

Vreni

SweetAngel
New Member
since 2000-10-29
Posts 2

14 posted 2000-10-29 12:34 PM


I really liked this poem, it almost made me cry.    Keep up the good work.
xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
15 posted 2000-10-29 12:40 PM


This poem was absolutely beautiful...i cant say enough about it! So sweet =o) Your an excellent writer...keep up the good work!!
jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
16 posted 2000-10-29 09:01 PM


every word in the dictionary has been used to describe you and your writing so Ive got nothing to say but "fantastical".

jeremy r


"...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
17 posted 2000-10-30 08:37 PM


this is really good...keep sharing

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


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