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Teen Poetry #3
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Nikkisweet
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 183
Tx, Dallas

0 posted 2000-06-21 09:28 PM



When I saw you in the hallway
I couldn't help but stare
And when you smiled at me
I could tell you really cared

Then here you come
Walking towards me
I know you want to talk
Or so thats what I thought

In my head I'm thinking
Whats he going to say
Somthing nice?
Or will I walk away with sadness

Oh my stomach is turning
I think its doing loopdy-loops
So many thoughts of what to say
And not enough time to turn away

You say hi and ask me whats going on
I turn bright red and say nothing at all
You tell me you really like me
And invite me to the mall

Of course I'll go I say
He just smiled and walked away
I'm so glad I say him
In the school hallway

© Copyright 2000 Nikkisweet - All Rights Reserved
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697

1 posted 2000-06-21 10:31 PM


This would be a great addition for the book!

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde
"The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief" -Shakespea

ValerieB726
Junior Member
since 2000-06-21
Posts 14
Louisville,OH, USA
2 posted 2000-06-21 10:35 PM


Wonderfully written! I loved how it was in a place we can relate to. I felt it could happen to me because of the feeling it conveyed.
P.S. could you please give replies to my 2 "Tears" and "I love you so much" They are my first real attempts at writing and i would like advice. Thanx.

amazon_lover
Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491
Dublin,Ireland
3 posted 2000-06-21 10:39 PM


Well done Niki....beautiful one..


Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
4 posted 2000-06-22 01:55 AM


seems like i've read this one before from you in a way but i know its different and as always its great. i really love it. keep it up.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


Nikkisweet
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 183
Tx, Dallas
5 posted 2000-06-22 03:48 PM


Thanks everyone for your replies.  And Valerie I'll reply to them as soon as I can.  Jerhamia (misspelled) when are you going to e-mail me?? And my friend says thanks for the reply.
StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932
Colorado
6 posted 2000-06-23 05:10 AM


How sweet. This is a beautiful poem! I love the way you verbalized your thoughts in such an organized manner. I have a problem with that I suppose. lol. Keep up the wonderful writing!! Love Always~*~Jessica~*~< !signature-->

~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~
~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~


[This message has been edited by StarPryncess17 (edited 06-23-2000).]

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
7 posted 2007-11-18 01:53 PM


Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

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