navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #3 » can you help me with a title?
Teen Poetry #3
Post A Reply Post New Topic can you help me with a title? Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Tamma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794
In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV

0 posted 2000-06-20 05:52 PM


He used to say he loved me,
Now I can't figure out why.

I didn't deserve him,
He let me in his heart.

I can feel the tears coming,
I know they're about to fall.

What did he see in me,
That no one else did.

So many questions,
That he won't answer.

I just want to know,
What he saw in me.


(if ya ever wanna chat, you can IM me on AOL: sexikitticat -or- Poetic Bliss 82)



© Copyright 2000 Tamma M. Wilson - All Rights Reserved
amazon_lover
Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491
Dublin,Ireland
1 posted 2000-06-20 05:58 PM


Hi Tamma
Its difficult as you dont desire certain qualities...you like the person as a whole...its nothing like to deserve or something.

Sincerely
A_L

Ethan Halo
Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793
on the roof again
2 posted 2000-06-20 06:03 PM


you must know that there is something in a person that makes him/her unique. i find it sad that someone else noticed your spark before you, yourself, did. but trust me on this, he's right. you may not see it, and he may have trouble putting it into words, but it's there.

as for a title, i had two thoughts.
"doubt" or "tell me something i don't know."

We all got somethin' we need to atone for.

CLBinLOVE
Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 147
Hilton Head, SC, USA
3 posted 2000-06-20 06:42 PM


well i like this poem alot, and i think thereason he saw something in you was that he looked harder than everyone else, maybe even you, i guess that shows how much he cared for you to begin with
and a good title could be
why me?
or... tell me waht you saw
dunno jus some thoughts

always follow your heart, never follow others unless it is truely where you want to go, and never give up a dream, maybe just set it aside for a while... :)

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
4 posted 2000-06-21 01:56 AM


as i say again i love your work. you have a teenage mind maybe cause you are but you use it to add a joy to others lives keep it up.

I'm the lord, I'm the havoc, I'm the soul



Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
5 posted 2000-06-21 02:47 AM


i really liked your poem. it was beautiful. as for what you wrote in it... there was so much negative attitude towards yourself. you shouldnt do that. everyone is special in there own way and he must have seen that in you. sometimes i feel the same way but there is no need to put yourself down over someone that in the long run may just end up breaking you heart.
Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
6 posted 2007-11-17 02:06 PM


Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #3 » can you help me with a title?

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary