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Dark Poetry #2
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AniKay83
Member
since 2000-06-28
Posts 388
Missing Since 1999

0 posted 2000-11-01 06:06 PM


I could tell you were mad at something,
after the way you treated me today.
I shouldn't have to take that.
Though, I couldn't bring myself to walk away.

Whatever reason's got you angry,
you should be saying it to me.
I'm worth at least an explanation.
Though, I couldn't bring myself to see.

You said the choice was easy.
A friend or lover to lose.
It should be-after asking that!
Though, I couldn't bring myself to choose.

I had so much to tell you,
but it stuck to my throat in a lump.
It was like standing with you on that ledge,
I couldn't bring myself to jump.

I thought maybe we were moving closer,
But life has a tendency to rearrange...
I hope you decide to stay my friend,
'Cause I couldn't bring myself to change.

Go ahead and stand by your decision,
if that's where your feelings lie.
Yesterday, I'd thought to make a move,
but now, I couldn't bring myself to try.

If the offer you'd want to present,
you know the position I'd take.
But with the current terms before me-
That's a choice I can't bring myself to make.

I'm sorry if I hurt you,
I was wrong for the stones not cast.
I have no idea how much you care,
but I couldn't bring myself to ask...




Much love all,
Krissie

© Copyright 2000 Christine Straka - All Rights Reserved
catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
1 posted 2000-11-01 06:36 PM


Oh my, you said it..I so relate to this. Great flow and writing too.
Sandra

Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
2 posted 2000-11-01 09:22 PM


Great thoughts and writing here, hope it all gets sorted out.  The not knowing and the confusion are the worst...
Isis

*I believe every time you put your words to paper, you change. Each feeling is set free, and you may follow.....*
~Isis~~Sovereign of the Spirit.

ThyWizard
Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 56
Chambersburg, PA, USA
3 posted 2000-11-01 09:51 PM


You couldn't have said it any better.  A very nice piece in all.  I felt that there were a few moments where you kind of stepped out of rhythm, but nothing real noticeable. I really appreciated the way you worked the emotion into the reader instead of explaining it to us, very good skill there.  The emotion was excellent and constant through the piece, good work.

" If who i am is what i have and what i have is lost, then who am I? " - unknown


Thy Wizard

Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

4 posted 2000-11-02 12:06 PM


Nice piece...leaving with a chose to make. very good

Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox

Xeonox
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764
CA, USA
5 posted 2000-11-02 01:27 AM


Great work. I loved it. I wished I had given this to my ex.  

Ronil (The sweet sound of summer sends serenity through my soul searching for that evermore solitude.)



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