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JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA

0 posted 2000-09-25 11:56 AM


Dissident
by J.Sage  


Could mixed feelings and a stuffy nose lure you back?
Would you let me climb your hill one more time?
My mountain man
Lover of mine
No dissidence
Could keep out the heart -
Ache and heartfelt love
Unending I fear
All I want is to hold you
Can you hear me laugh at myself
From where you are?
Did you laugh too?
At the notion of our affairs
With others and each other
No distraction big enough to keep me from your illness
Sick inside
Sneezes come with dissidence
You keep me away
I commit to my haze and my disease
That you gave to me
But I hope each time I die
That you can hear me scream
One knee down
I kneel to my fantasy
Love that will not subside
Repulsed me until I gave into the disease
Of a love that won't go
And a lover that won't stay
Come home
I dream of a prayer
That would bring you back
I kneel
I propose to my disease
The unending desire
(fantasy)
that my dissident lover
will return to me.


© Copyright 2000 JSage - All Rights Reserved
a-alibaster
Member
since 2000-01-08
Posts 392

1 posted 2000-09-25 12:03 PM


This is so incredibly different....I love it!
Until...ali


"There is an alter ego which
dwells in every soul..."
a-alibaster

"I am as I am, nothing more, nothing less,
I am tears of pain, tears of Death.

JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA
2 posted 2000-09-25 12:05 PM


thank you!  different is good, in my opinion.  

-Jes

LM
Senior Member
since 2000-08-03
Posts 585

3 posted 2000-09-25 03:19 PM


It is very unique  
Very interesting poem, I enjoyed reading and liked it a lot.
Take Care!



"Most girls want a man with the mean green
Don't wanna dance if he can't be
Everything that I dream up
A man that understands real love"


JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA
4 posted 2000-09-25 03:25 PM


Thank you!  I understand that it isn't the most easily interpreted poem and I hope that doesn't turn too many of you off, but when I read a poem, sometimes the most personal touches and abstract metaphors make me love and appreciate it even more. I'm glad that this personal little poem of mine was appreciated by someone other than me.  

-Jes

bluebrdy65
Member
since 2000-05-16
Posts 276
Gladys,
5 posted 2000-09-25 08:41 PM


Great Job here J
this made me think.
Its really deep.
Loved it Blue.
It always amazes me that the more I read on here the poems just seem to get better and better.

JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA
6 posted 2000-09-27 10:06 AM


Thank you, Blue.  really deep?  Hope that's good and not contrived.  I only write what I feel.  Thank you for your response.

-Jes

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