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poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia

0 posted 2000-09-14 12:18 PM


Im walking on edges.
thin lines written
on vast expanse
of stolen time.
I need to
find my balance.
don't fall girl,
no safety net
to catch your
fallen angel complex.
spread those wings,
tarred and feathered,
earthbound satellite.
the universe would'nt
look so bad
from here if
I'd open my eyes.
deep rooted addiction
to the nutrients
lacking in barren soil.
I wont let go
of my melancholy
because I'm just
too afraid of
the glow.< !signature-->

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos




[This message has been edited by poutprincess (edited 09-14-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Dawn van Krieken - All Rights Reserved
brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
1 posted 2000-09-14 01:40 PM


I wont let go
of my melancholy
because I'm just
too afraid of
the glow

Dawn, never be afraid to glow... Shine I know you can.. wonderful poem and I am sure one day that you will let yourself radiate.  




This is the hour when the mysteries emerge
A strangeness so hard to reflect A moment so
moving goes straight to your heart" JOy divison

JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA
2 posted 2000-09-14 02:58 PM


"fallen angel complex", "don't fall girl"

I love these lines.  I love the whole thing!  I love the way you write!!!  Keep em' coming.

-Jes

LM
Senior Member
since 2000-08-03
Posts 585

3 posted 2000-09-14 03:53 PM


Wow...this really spoke to me, great stuff!
"no safety net to catch your fallen angel complex"
How did you come up with that?  
Loved it, I really understand it. All the best!



"Most girls want a man with the mean green
Don't wanna dance if he can't be
Everything that I dream up
A man that understands real love"


poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
4 posted 2000-09-15 05:56 AM


Brian:  , you know they do say too much radiation can kill you! LOL...sorry, i do appreciate the uplifting comments thank you!

Jes: well THANK YOU! you just made my day! now, i may just be blind, but havent seen any new work out by you lately, dont tellme you are holding out on us!

LM: thank you, but dont ask me how i come up with those things....i just think its my lunatic twin coming out to play once in a while! LOL.....thanks again!

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos



Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
5 posted 2000-09-16 02:36 AM


Dawn,
this is a shining example of good poetry. I felt the rope, I felt the anxiety I even felt the deep desire that I could glow.
*HUGS*

Kethry


"It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures;
but it is the loss that shapes the image,
gathers the flowers weaves the garland."-

poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
6 posted 2000-09-16 09:50 AM


Kethry: thank you so much for that wonderful comment! and especially thank you for the *hug*...

~Dawn

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos



lotharingia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897
saarbruecken, Germany
7 posted 2000-09-20 12:49 PM


Princess,

This is so vivid! Gives me vertigo. I like it so much I can't say it.

Afraid of the glow, attached to melacholy. Oh wow. Gasp! And so on ...


Lotharingia
"Dreams are life, reality, creation" Miguel de Unanumo



catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
8 posted 2000-09-20 10:25 PM


This is superb poetry. Afraid of the glow, great line. All of them are, actually.
Take care.
Catalinamoon

poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
9 posted 2000-09-21 09:32 AM


lotharingia and catalinamoon: you both are very kind! thank you so much!
~Dawn

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos



JSage
Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91
Nashua, NH USA
10 posted 2000-09-21 09:44 AM


I'm not holding out.  Ummm... I think I have 3 original posts in the adult forum and maybe 5 in dark passions, something like that.  So, you could look for those.  Other than that, maybe I'm a little shy.  If you ever need a fix, Dawn, there's always my homepage.  

-Jes

PS - You rock, Dawn.

poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
11 posted 2000-09-21 04:15 PM


Jes:
oh you dont worry, i have spent much time on your webpage!...i rock? well.....i believe we may be poetic twins my dear!
~Dawn< !signature-->

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos




[This message has been edited by poutprincess (edited 09-21-2000).]

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
12 posted 2000-09-21 04:27 PM


Be brave, be adventurous...let go of that melancholy and go for the gold...I mean the glow...enjoyed reading your words....James
Snowdwen
Member
since 2000-09-16
Posts 75
Louisiana
13 posted 2000-09-21 04:56 PM


Dawn:
Your pome left me breathless.. I fels as if I was on the rope.. Great work!
Michell

"You live you learn and life moves on"


poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
14 posted 2000-09-21 05:58 PM


james: thank you! i'll be sure to try!

snowdwen: thank you! glad to leave you breathless!

"Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos



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