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Maya the Brokenhearted
Member
since 2000-02-13
Posts 66


0 posted 2000-08-28 10:28 PM


gifted was I, e'er the morn doth come
in sight, nay not any sight
but hindsight, not foresight
to ease my suff'ring soul
nay I could ne'er break this chain
that binds me a somewhat willing captive
dark clutching rings, of finest hammer'd steel
holding me fast to my chosen course
kept in time by my weak will

chosen love, I tore asunder
plund'ring, taking, all for naught
left him there upon far shore
to weep for future's lost
it cannot be to my advant
to keep him by and by
for with a fett'ring emote he yields
to day by day by day
as ounce by ounce his life's blood
seeps from within his very soul
he cannot give another thing
so I must let him go
used him not in selfish gain
my heart doth drum with broken beat
my eyes, my ears, my heart's fair lawn
will ne'er forget his iv'ry smile
he's carved himself in deepest stone
and left me no respite now
I too shall mourn his loss by day
and live in dark'ned soul by night



© Copyright 2000 Maya the Brokenhearted - All Rights Reserved
Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
1 posted 2000-08-28 11:40 PM


Maya...daaaaayyyummmmmm....whoa....this piece, is....absolutely breathtaking.  It's dark, it's eeeeeeevile, it is extreme in it's insensitivity.  Wow!!!!

The Machiavellian mindset presented by the speaker, the karmic backlash, the beat and rhythm all drew me in, leaving me a-gape.  Powerful stuff.

Xeonox
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764
CA, USA
2 posted 2000-08-29 02:31 AM


The usuage and the pattern of yoru word is just great. You have a great talent. Thank you for sharing it with us.  

Ronil (What I say I live by and what I live by is what I create).

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
3 posted 2000-08-29 09:04 AM


Hey Maya - This is beautifully written - You've got some pretty intense feelings here... I sincerely hope all's well in the end..
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2000-08-29 02:55 PM


Truly a rich captivating read...James
Menage Numero Trois
Junior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 33
Zee South of France
5 posted 2000-08-29 06:37 PM


ahh yes thees I know well

[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 08-29-2000).]

Maya the Brokenhearted
Member
since 2000-02-13
Posts 66

6 posted 2000-08-29 06:39 PM


Ali~ well you know me, insensitive and karmic! *wink* Actually you got exactly what I was getting at...only thing you missed was the hint of regret towards the end.
LY Oodles....

Xeno~ I was SO inspired by this! My heart was going to burst if I didn't get it all on paper asap! Thanks so much for your kind reply  

Nan~ Yup you guessed it...intense is the word of the day. It will all work out, I just KNOW it! *hugs*

James~ thanks so very much!

Yikes the menage....

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
7 posted 2000-09-02 09:26 PM


Wow, Maya, this was intense, yes, and very well written. And understandable feelings, from my point of view. Got it..
catalinamoon

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