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MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA

0 posted 2000-07-21 09:20 AM


Not the Forever of Yesterday

just can't do it
sitting in a circle once a week
maybe more
listening, not wanting to hear
sharing, not wanting to give
trying, but not wanting to do

tissues collect tears
that flow with words
angry words
hurtful words
why me words
always words
coming from within
seething for days, months
even years
and words coming from outside
some blaming,
others suggesting,
always advising

attacking each morning
a fog of words
thick and uninviting
forming a wall
one, of too many words
built and piled too high to climb
with no way to get through

and in the darkness of night
eyes closed, breathing calmed
body at still
cloaked in those words
so heavy now
that dreams no longer
have their small little corner
of their own
and are beginning to fade
from over use
never to be replaced

and feeling
i just can't do this
the connection's not there
i am too detached
what ever happened
to "forever"

M
6*2k



© Copyright 2000 Maureen - All Rights Reserved
SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

1 posted 2000-07-21 09:31 AM


~OooEee,...love how this one is so continuous in it's reading.
"i am too detached"....this line is blinding me. Great expression. Be well M. *Peace.

MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
2 posted 2000-07-21 09:38 AM


forced myself to go to an al-anon meeting...couldn't handle it..after I realized the majority have been going there for 10-15 years...came home feeling defeated in more ways than one..thank you for the  words Spitfire..I decided my outlet and comfort to be in  poetry and my poet friends..they  offer more than those meetings ever could..not saying that  it  doesn't help others..just not my cup of tea...
~~soft smile
Maureen

Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
3 posted 2000-07-21 10:10 AM


Maureen...the very things you describe here is what's kept me out of therapy for years.  Maybe one-on-one, but never "group and grope".  This forum here has done more for me than anything else.  And, "you just gotta feel the love". So well said.  Hardrock
a-alibaster
Member
since 2000-01-08
Posts 392

4 posted 2000-07-21 01:11 PM


Detatched......that is me.
I enjoyed this , it is wonderful...so free it flows off one lips.


"There is an alter ego which
dwells in every soul..."
a-alibaster

"I am as I am, nothing more, nothing less,
I am tears of pain, tears of Death.

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
5 posted 2000-07-21 02:07 PM


I really like this, especially the next to last stanza. Dreams fading from overuse. I can feel that one. Take care, beautiful poem
Catalinamoon

MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
6 posted 2000-07-21 10:57 PM


Hardrock...well I have been on other forums and only last week was invited here..wish I had known about it sooner as some others tend to have jealousies and anonymous posters...(have had my share of both) but yes  I told a friend of mine who is a psychiatrist about the poetry  verses the group therapy and he said  each person has to find what is right for them....and in those groups you are forced to talk and feel your  problems among strangers...in poetry I feel among friends...
thank you for your kind words...
{{hugs}}
Maureen

MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
7 posted 2000-07-21 11:01 PM


a-alibaster...such a nice response..thank you
~~soft smiles
Mauren


MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
8 posted 2000-07-21 11:06 PM


catalinamoon
...love your name..*s
thank you for  reading and enjoying
~~softly
Maureen

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