»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #2
»
arrrrrgh!
| Dark Poetry #2 |
|
arrrrrgh! |
|
|
Jaysun C Member
since 2000-07-20
Posts 56 |
such a pretty wall such a perfect lie such a deep hole dont read me for what i write read me for what i show you every day, it's the truth, it's my wall falls down and drowns in a selfish clogged hole as pleasure tightens hold pain opens up the way happyness runs dry parched praying to drown again, praying all alone, deep praying to the bone never sees what's to be never knows wheto close never pleasure will to see helpless leave me i will bleede hope in heaven come to me broken boy for she was free Heather weather can not teather faiththful hatefull never - gratefull lonely holmley little boy all ****ed up his key to joy faster master little ******* kill yourself cause no one cares must be read or surley dead I can no longer live this lonley lie pray for sain and will to fly higher will to live than will to die |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Jaysun C - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Dark_kisses_Within Senior Member
since 2000-03-21
Posts 680Kansas |
ECK!!! This one made me shiver! It seemed so full of hate and distrust. Its always nice to vent away the pain, isnt it? Peace DkW Once there was a darkness Deep and endless night You gave me everything you had Ahhhhhh you gave me light |
||
|
Jaysun C Member
since 2000-07-20
Posts 56 |
D_K_W god name, and yes, yes it does ps. sometimes it feels good to shiver |
||
|
Ian Llewellyn ap-Griffith Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 197Cincinnati, Oh, U.S.A. |
Very, very nice use of language. It all flows very well. |
||
|
Magebeast Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 60 |
Wow |
||
|
lotharingia Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897saarbruecken, Germany |
What an excellent piece! The poem reads to me like it's coming from someone on the brink. Multiple voices all blending together. And you have some awesome lines: "praying all alone, deep praying to the bone" simply fantastic! Lotharingia "Dreams are life, reality, creation" Miguel de Unanumo |
||
catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Very powerful venting.Take care. |
||
|
SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Jaysun C,...first let me say, welcome here! This poem is bleeding with emotion and written so well in it's continuous flow and sort of falling form, right into me...Enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing. Be well JC. *Peace. |
||
|
Hardrock Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948New Hampshire, USA |
Very well done, JC. It's that "higher will to live than to die", that keeps us from going over the brink. Very enjoyable. Hardrock |
||
|
Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
your poems are of dark side and thank you for posting them in the perfect forum. Ronil (What I say I live by and what I live by is what I create). |
||
|
Jaysun C Member
since 2000-07-20
Posts 56 |
thank you every one, I am so glad you enjoyed |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
