navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » They Turn You On Again
Dark Poetry #2
Post A Reply Post New Topic They Turn You On Again Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396


0 posted 2000-07-10 11:50 PM


They Turn You On Again

Seeing you through blue tinted shades,
reminds me of those days.
Of the heat and the lack of air in that place.
The lack of understanding blowing around.
Hatred plates for supper and tainted tears for tea.
Reminds me of your blistered hands,
the anger that they swell with and the pain.
The smell of your cigarette smoke and the oil on your skin.
Sea blown air and tea cups chipped in kitchens the size of a john.
Collages of chairs and tupperware scattered.
An art form this place.
This expression in it's rawness,...
your hatred splattered.
Hazed and closing and returning to the way.
These shades they turn you on again.
They make us there again and they make you the same.





© Copyright 2000 SpitFire - All Rights Reserved
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
1 posted 2000-07-10 11:54 PM


Wow. Hatred plates for supper and tainted tears for tea. Now that paints a vivid portrait in the mind! Awesome usage of the monster metaphor!

Christopher

Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
2 posted 2000-07-11 12:21 PM


Oh my sweet, sweet SpitFire...how can you possibly get any better than this?  I saw every image...looked through those blue tint shades...and saw only the beauty of your words.  What a terrific poem....Hardrock
taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

3 posted 2000-07-11 02:44 AM


Wow! Hmm... I'm trying to think of the exact right words to express my thoughts on this one SpitFire... I guess, excellent!!!  
lotharingia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897
saarbruecken, Germany
4 posted 2000-07-11 08:03 AM


This is brilliant. So vivid! Each line is one to savour (in spite of the bitter taste).
BTW, I dreamt about you last night! Or rather I dreamt I was reading your lilac words in comic!


Lotharingia
"For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?"
Tom Holland


Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
5 posted 2000-07-11 09:57 AM


Hey kid, a very vivid picture here, I'm just dropping in for a quick view.
And you caught my eye. haha
and my heart.
love ya.
Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
6 posted 2000-07-11 11:05 AM


Awesome, as usual. Very strong picture. Hatred for dinner,thats my usual fare..
Love your work, all of it.
Cat..



"If a man moves you to feel like a woman,
the least you can do is let him."
Merrit Malloy

Deborah1
Senior Member
since 2000-06-22
Posts 653
New Hampshire
7 posted 2000-07-11 12:28 PM


Previous posts speak it all, but I had to comment on exceptional work done here by you!!! Thanks for sharing

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson...You find the present tense..and the past perfect
"Anonymous"


Wren
Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 312

8 posted 2000-07-11 12:40 PM


This poems absouloutly GLOWS! Wow! I am infinitly impressed. (Whatever that means) Great imagery!"your hatred splattered"
Wonderful!
-Wren

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
9 posted 2000-07-11 10:43 PM


SF,

Sometimes we just have to accept that which we cannot change and move on.  You have such a way with describing scenes that I feel like I am there beside you.  This was very dark, but so beautiful.  Excellent writing my friend.  

LW


Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

10 posted 2000-07-12 08:21 AM


Seeing you through blue tinted shades,
reminds me of those days.
Of the heat and the lack of air in that place.
The lack of understanding blowing around.
Hatred plates for supper and tainted tears for tea.
Reminds me of your blistered hands,
the anger that they swell with and the pain.
------------------
hey you...

SF..this is awesome writing...powerful
excellent imagery and use of metaphor
your wrote these memories so that they
are haunting and vivid...
very strong work...
take care
jm

I think I could need - this in my life
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you
MB20

insect
Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014

11 posted 2000-07-13 12:44 PM


Excellent poem!
I love it when you title your poems!
Get some rest you!
Have fun!


Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
12 posted 2000-07-14 12:23 PM


this is a very good poem and i know you can always get better and always are. so do keep it up. SpitFire

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
13 posted 2000-07-14 01:00 AM


im sorry Spitfire that i didnt really get this poem..whats with those shades and the two characters in the poem, may i ask?hmmm...
but anyway, i still enjoyed this read..."Hatred plates for supper and tainted tears for tea" really jumped right out at me,
attracting my attention like the vivid descriptive phrases here too

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
14 posted 2000-07-14 06:05 PM


I am blown away totally. Such a powerful poem and my favourite out all the great poems I have read that flowed from your man. Man this needs further reading. Very dark and intense. I will get back to you on this poem later. Until then take care and peace

"I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else" faster-Manic street preachers.

Portia
Member
since 2000-05-18
Posts 157

15 posted 2000-07-14 09:34 PM


I hate to say who this reminds me of. You do so well at capturing the lesser side of human kindness. People have seen me say it before, and I will say it again: "the poem is not the poet." But I find myself sincerely hoping you have not had to live through this.
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » They Turn You On Again

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary