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Dark Poetry #2
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ZuMBLe
Junior Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 33


0 posted 2000-07-08 03:37 AM


This is not the most well thought out poem.  But I'm in one of those moods and I thought I would put it in to words.. I think those are the best kind of poems.  The ones that just spill from the heart.  If you like it.. Great.. If not.. well, it was written for me.. Not really anyone else.. =P
---------------------
Forever After

Forever has come and gone
Today is after
And I am empty
Words you whispered
Lasted but a time
Forever never ends
Until after begins
You said you would love me
Forever


[This message has been edited by ZuMBLe (edited 07-08-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Raymond So - All Rights Reserved
kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
1 posted 2000-07-08 03:57 AM


ZuMBle,well i like this...this is short and simple yet speaks volumes of your anguish...well done..

im just confused about these two lines:
Forever never ends
Until after begins
how is forever never ending when it has "come and gone" in the first place?pls entertain this froggie here

lotharingia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897
saarbruecken, Germany
2 posted 2000-07-08 04:00 AM


I like this very much, and I don't know why you think it's not well thought-out?! It applies to all who suffer lost love.

Lotharingia
"For God's sake, he's a poet. Poets are meant to feel miserable. Otherwise, what the hell are they here for? What are they going to write about?"
Tom Holland


ZuMBLe
Junior Member
since 2000-03-27
Posts 33

3 posted 2000-07-08 04:01 AM


Forever is not supposed to end.. but often we say things will last "forever".. Like love.  But they end.  And that is after.  Forever had come and gone.  It made sense to me when I was writing it.. Does it make sense?

Zum

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

4 posted 2000-07-08 03:56 PM


~Makes sense to me,...and I like it. Good work getting it out of you. Take care. *Peace.
Deborah1
Senior Member
since 2000-06-22
Posts 653
New Hampshire
5 posted 2000-07-08 05:15 PM


This made perfect sense to me, whats more important is you wrote it, a true expression, and great job!!!!!
catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
6 posted 2000-07-08 06:41 PM


I like it a lot and made too much sense..Reminds me of a favorite song that includes this line."Does she know you said you'd hold me till you died-But your still alive."
kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
7 posted 2000-07-08 08:20 PM


Thanx ZuMBle for your explanation..now i think i have a better understanding of this piece
Wren
Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 312

8 posted 2000-07-08 09:27 PM


Oh, how sad! I know exactly how you feel!  
Great poem! Loved it!

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