navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » Not Again
Dark Poetry #2
Post A Reply Post New Topic Not Again Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
LuckyinLove
Member
since 2000-06-25
Posts 57
Australia

0 posted 2000-06-25 05:17 AM


I let it happen all over again
the fool is me, I take the blame
I let you in, I forgave the pain
Its my heart I need to tame

I have to learn to live without
the evil of your manner
I have to learn to scream and shout
I deserve more than your lying grammer

In the end I'll be the one
who lives life with real meaning
after you have had your fun
you'll be busy with you soul cleaning

You'll miss your chance of true love
because lifes so presious and short
You'll beg and wonder up above
It's me you will see with one small thought...

Could I have been your soul mate
It will play over in your head
knowing and feeling it's to late
You'll be alone and then you'll be dead



© Copyright 2000 LuckyinLove - All Rights Reserved
taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

1 posted 2000-06-25 05:26 AM


Wow! Very good poem   It skips along well... but is soooooo final.  Unfortunately some people are blind to what could make them happy - but then, perhaps they need to be told quite clearly. A sad poem, in a way. Look forward to reading more of your poetry  
Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
2 posted 2000-06-25 09:54 AM


Welcome LiL to Dark Passions.  You can let ALL of us in, because there is a lot of love in this forum.  Great poem...and so true.  You try, get hurt, try again.  Sometimes I think my heart has a case of the "Duh's!!"
Hope to see more.  Hardrock.

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

3 posted 2000-06-25 10:33 AM


Welcome to the forum!
Thank you for your reply to my piece on Wilderness.
Don't worry about writing like anyone else. Everyone has their own style. Don't force rhymes, let it flow free, from your heart and your soul. If it doesn't want to rhyme, hey it doesn't have to.
poetry is sensory perception. Close  your eyes, and picture what you want to say and then work on the words. You will find love, support and encouragement here in this forum, it saved my life when I thought I'd never write again.
IF the desire is there, write!!!
post, and write again.
a good friend said to me "don't tell us, show us!"
I'm forever learning, I've learned so much from the poets here, so much.
good to have you here, and remember when you write of pain, don't hold back, something happens when you put it out there, on paper, or the screen, it becomes more separate from you and makes you freer.
It's a wonderful feeling.


Kathleen

"How do I love thee? Let
me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sig

Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
4 posted 2000-06-25 12:17 PM


Yes welcome to Dark Passions,
You seem to have nailed the old phrase that say's
"You'll never know what you missed, until it's gone."

I have said this a few times.

love your work kid.

Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

sgreybe
Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 209
London, UK
5 posted 2000-06-25 02:43 PM


Dear LuckyinLove

Welcome to passions!

This is a real superb piece of writing my friend.  Keep it up.

It is so true... if it is about you, then maybe you should put yourself first at let others catch up with you!

A great piece.

Sylvia

kynder
Senior Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 537
Tallahassee, Florida
6 posted 2000-06-25 07:46 PM


boy this is good.  you are angry!!! i love it!! i have felt this so deeply and strongly i thought it would overtake me sometimes.  looking forward to more!!!!!

kynder

Across the gateway of my heart,
I wrote "No Thoroughfare!!"
But love came laughing by and
Cried "I enter everywhere!!!"

Herbert Shipman

LuckyinLove
Member
since 2000-06-25
Posts 57
Australia
7 posted 2000-06-26 12:03 PM


Thankyou so much everyone for your encouragment, Im affraid I am not very good with words, but the heartache has brought them out, Im not in your league but I will share my poems with you anyway, I am sorry if my comments are off key, and I don't understand where your all comming from, but I have enjoyed it here very much, and I will try to understand all your poems, these are the first poems I have ever read, and I keep thinking they all relate to me some how, so sorry if I keep talking about myself when I comment on your poems its just that I am a baby when it comes to poetry.

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
8 posted 2000-06-26 02:20 AM


well if your a baby whem it comes to poetry then i guess were all here to help you. this is great work and i wish to read more of you and as it goes welcome to passions dark or otherwise.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


firejerm
Member
since 2000-06-13
Posts 217
Springfield, OH, good ol USA
9 posted 2000-06-26 02:45 AM


I think we have all written this poem in one form or another.  We can all relate to the anger it unleashes.  Other than a few grammatical errors, this one spoke to me!  I have written several like it in the last year.  Look forward to more!

"Those little slices of death, how I loathe them."
-Edgar Allen Poe

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

10 posted 2000-06-26 08:23 AM


Lucky: we're all babes at one time, remember one thing, your poetry...once you write it, you must try to separate it from yourself., and what I mean by that is be willing to look at it for what it is, a craft.
that way you can learn, improve and don't worry about being like anyone else., you are unique.


You left me, sweet, two legacies,-
a legacy of love
A Heavenly Father would content,
Had He the offer of;
Emily Dickinson

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » Not Again

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary