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Dark Poetry #2
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jennie may*
Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 122


0 posted 2000-06-24 11:48 PM


breath
touch
a
kiss on your face

will never replace

empty hands
disbelief
and
tennis bands

I use to hide the scars



© Copyright 2000 jennie may* - All Rights Reserved
Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
1 posted 2000-06-24 11:56 PM


Well put Jennie...all of us use something to hide the scars....sometimes it's just a smile.  Enjoyed it......Hardrock
Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
2 posted 2000-06-25 12:01 PM


Jen, self inflicting scars are not the way to go.
Although it is an old Indian custom, to ?? cut yourself when in unseen pain. Not to encourage it but this isn't the way to deal with it. If I'm off base then tell me, and I'll put it to right, if not??.

Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

jennie may*
Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 122

3 posted 2000-06-25 12:45 PM


no-- i do not cut myself, although I do encourage readers to interpret poetry in any way they desire.  So if that is the way you see my work, that is okay.  But personally, I don't inflict physical harm on myself.  "tennis bands I use to hide the scars" is a symbolism of the pain this person infliced on me emotionally. Just a metaphor--thanx for your concern, Joel!


Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
4 posted 2000-06-25 01:09 AM


OK Jen, I guess I'm caught up with a student that does this to herself, then calls and tells me that she has blood all over the floor, and need help. my apologies, well hell you know us men, hahaha single tracks.
Thanks kid.

Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
5 posted 2000-06-25 02:36 AM


i feel all people hide some type of pain. but its not always the right thing to do cause sometimes telling people helps. loved the work can't wait to read more from you.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


firejerm
Member
since 2000-06-13
Posts 217
Springfield, OH, good ol USA
6 posted 2000-06-25 02:58 AM


Or is it using objects of vanity to hide our scars caused by emotion?  Just a guess here  

"Those little slices of death, how I loathe them."
-Edgar Allen Poe

jennie may*
Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 122

7 posted 2000-06-25 03:43 AM


Lots of readers are stumped.  I'll explain.  To put it in simple terms, the poem is about never having the one you love again.  A kiss on his face will never take the place of my disbelief in how it all went wrong.  I use anything I can to cover up the emotional scars.  Tennis bands represent anything we use to conceal our pain.  But I always say to interpret poetry any way you desire.  There is no right answer to a piece of art.  


LuckyinLove
Member
since 2000-06-25
Posts 57
Australia
8 posted 2000-06-25 04:50 AM


I didn't know how to hide my pain, I did'nt know how to cover it up, so I just went with my feelings and let everybody know, it until I started to write peoms
taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

9 posted 2000-06-25 04:55 AM


Very good poem   Liked it immensely!
firejerm
Member
since 2000-06-13
Posts 217
Springfield, OH, good ol USA
10 posted 2000-06-26 02:37 AM


You are right, people do try to over-analyze poetry sometimes.  I guess it's from our English teachers telling US what a poem meant instead of letting the reader interpret it as they see fit.  I apologize!!!

Jeremy

"Those little slices of death, how I loathe them."
-Edgar Allen Poe

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

11 posted 2000-06-26 01:38 PM


~Oh I do like the way that you write.  Very nicely done.  Sad yet softly beautiful....your words.  Thanks for sharing this bit of you. Take care. *Peace.
kitkat
Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878
Nova Scotia
12 posted 2000-06-26 02:20 PM


We all have different ways to express our pain. You did a nice job here. Your words are very effective.

--------------
You got to get up every morning with a smile on your face
and show the world all the love in your heart
Then people are gonna treat you better
You're gonna find, yes you will
That your beautiful as you feel.~~~ Carol King



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