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Dark Poetry #2
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Portia
Member
since 2000-05-18
Posts 157


0 posted 2000-06-23 10:18 PM


the wind hushes outside
the balmy air cools

I drowse...

        ...so sleepy

I wait for you,
unwilling to succumb to the
tempting, cottony black
until I see you.

"You are my moon
you are my sun
Heaven knows what you are..."

The heavens only know that until I feel
your cool hands,
your warm smile,

sleep shall not have me.


[This message has been edited by Portia (edited 06-23-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Portia - All Rights Reserved
gothicmoth
Member
since 2000-06-05
Posts 89

1 posted 2000-06-23 11:04 PM


This is an excellent poem. The flow and the mystery make me read it over and over again. It makes one wonder who or what the speaker is waiting for. I can see it as a worried vigil and also a pledge of love with vigilance. A stunning piece of work.
Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
2 posted 2000-06-23 11:42 PM


What a wonderful piece!!  
Bridgette


"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown

Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
3 posted 2000-06-24 12:34 PM


I thought it was your old man at first but then no cold hands and warm breath.
Help, I have no desire to wait up for anyone like this.

great I enjoy this kid. the not knowing.

Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
4 posted 2000-06-24 01:36 AM


i feel that sleep sometimes will take me into death and i will not wake up. ilove this of of yours as well keep it up.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


kynder
Senior Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 537
Tallahassee, Florida
5 posted 2000-06-25 06:57 PM


this poem makes me want to sleep so that when what i am waiting for arrives, i will be well rested and won't have to sleep the whole time!!!!!!!!! wonderful imagery!! way to go!!


kynder

Across the gateway of my heart,
I wrote "No Thoroughfare!!"
But love came laughing by and
Cried "I enter everywhere!!!"

Herbert Shipman

Deborah1
Senior Member
since 2000-06-22
Posts 653
New Hampshire
6 posted 2000-07-01 05:03 PM


Nights of waiting and wondering..I enjoyed this, I had a my own image with this one, Great Job
Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
7 posted 2000-07-02 10:33 AM


Portia....makes me wonder how many times someone has awaited my arrival....and I never do.  Guilt trip here.  Thanks....Hardrock
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