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Dark Poetry #2
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Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA

0 posted 2000-06-23 03:03 PM


Critical Analysis

I fought for my country,
I thought that I was tough.
Semper Fi and UhhhRah!
When going got really rough.

But those of you who come here,
And bare your soul in verse.
And lay your hearts upon the stage,
Could have a fate much worse.

So the brave ones aren’t in soldiering,
Not in the mire and muck.
They’re out in front of their audience,
And the audience could say…..YOU SUCK.

Marv Hardin  06/23/00



© Copyright 2000 Marv Hardin - All Rights Reserved
Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
1 posted 2000-06-23 03:08 PM


i like this poem alot. but i must say i don't think ant of us here would do that but i know some who would and their well you know the words. keep this up .

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2000-06-23 03:44 PM


Harrah to the critics from coast to coast
to them I lift my glass in toast
for whether they like me well or not...
poetry's my blood, it is my lot.

But to the men who've laid their being
to give us a future, sight unseen,
and struggled through the grievous wars,
with their blood thus shed on shores,

to them I lift my glass in toast
to the warriors from coast to coast,
to the men, and women too,
who cared for me, and cared for you.

***

Hardrock, nice to meet you...and anyone who can spur me into a reply such as this is, IMHO, an inspiration. I look forward to reading more of your work.  A belated, but hearty, Welcome, to Passions!

Sunshine

~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
Helen Keller ~~~


Hardrock
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 948
New Hampshire, USA
3 posted 2000-06-23 03:55 PM


Thanks JJ and Sunshine....I appreciate all the support and positive feedback I have received here.  Quite frankly, I have "camped out" here for the past few days....licking my wounds and looking for answers.  The wounds are better, I'm stronger and because of all the people posting poems and replies, I think I can move on with my life....whereever it may take me.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2000-06-23 05:00 PM


Well, no matter where you go, be sure to come back and visit here now and then, we can use good poets like yourself.  By the way, I took this response of my and expounded on it in OP #8 - you'll see it as "A response to Hardrock's..."< !signature-->

Sunshine

~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
Helen Keller ~~~



[This message has been edited by Sunshine (edited 06-23-2000).]

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
5 posted 2000-06-23 06:00 PM


I don't think you'll get many people here saying "You suck" It's a pretty nifty swifty place. lol.

Joy

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

6 posted 2000-06-23 08:27 PM


~Hardrock,...I am really enjoying you. hehe.  This is a most wonderful piece.  Very interesting what you say....though having someone say I sucked would probably be a lot better than what could happen,...well you know what I am trying to say.  This piece was much enjoyed. *Peace.
catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
7 posted 2000-06-23 09:44 PM


Its true, how scary it is when first showing others your poems. But I bet the war was worse.
Hope you are healing..
Sandra/catalinamoon

Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
8 posted 2000-06-24 12:08 PM


Yes Hardrock, a great stand, but turn slightly when your in front, not all the enemy is up front.
Great post. guy.

more, more.

Joel.

I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

Nancee
Junior Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 45
Australia
9 posted 2000-06-24 09:44 AM


Touche` Sunshine.
Joel-only darkness knows the depth...

Hardrock  YOU ARE!

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